Comments on: The Blowjob Curse

By: jak

jak — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 20:52:10 +0000

The idea is to provide and receive sexual pleasure – I mean responsibly – but it is not up to a blog to determine who and who doesnt fuck or suck or with who making love or having gratuitous mutually enjoyable sex is up to the two er or three well four or five well up to the partners involved.

By: Linda

Linda — Sat, 19 Jun 2004 21:41:04 +0000

There’s a difference between viewing the world through a racial lens all the time and viewing the world through a racial lens while writing a blog.
Not every blog is a complete and representative sample of the blogger’s identity, after all. A blog about race and sex doesn’t necessarily mean the blogger’s obsessed with race and sex, a blog about video games doesn’t necessarily mean the blogger plays video games 24/7, a blog about Julius Caesar doesn’t necessarily mean the blogger views everything IRL through an ancient Roman lens.

By: Burbman

Burbman — Wed, 09 Jun 2004 01:46:02 +0000

Everyone is missing the point…that most women feel this way about giving bjs. That’s the true issue here!

By: remittance girl

remittance girl — Tue, 08 Jun 2004 16:03:21 +0000

How can anyone ever get lazy about blowjobs? They are truly the most control a girl is ever going to have! Personally I adore them because no matter how non-verbal, no matter how shy or inhibited, no matter how stalwart the man… a good 10 minutes of effort on your part tells you everything you will ever really need to know about him. And of course, coincidentally, it feels good!
;-)
rg

By: Bacchus

Bacchus — Tue, 08 Jun 2004 12:11:43 +0000

Some interesting racial assumptions in that last post.
Nope, we’ll never agree. I intend no disrespect, but I still think viewing the world through a racial lense (complete with little racial ID tags over everyone’s head) perpetuates racism. Which is why I find it curious when folks who profess concern about racism do it.

By: The Asian Guy

The Asian Guy — Tue, 08 Jun 2004 08:50:09 +0000

Bacchus,
My recent postings on the site try to make this point clear: there comes a time when one can get TOO caught up in race when it comes to sex. Whiny, bitter Asian men who seem to think all the chips are stacked against them might be right in principle (the chips are stacked against them) but complaining loudly about the problem doesn’t actually solve the problem. That said though, my postings aren’t complaints about race and sex insofar as they’re observations and ideas.
But, we’ll have to disagree about this all being ancient history. I think many white men in America would seem to think it is but for men and women of color, we have to deal with the legacies of racism as it pertains to sex. Please don’t take offense at what I’m about to say but I don’t have the time or interest to try to explain that all to you but it is VERY real.
Your attitude is very reminiscent of someone like California’s Ward Connerly whose approach to dealing with racism is: don’t talk about it and it will go away. Forgive me if I call that a rather naive attitude. Maybe you don’t want to live in a world of racial categories but Bacchus, most of us who aren’t white don’t get to live in your world. I wish we could, really, I do. But we don’t.
Look, we could go 12 rounds on this and never agree and I’m not trying to disrespect you or your site. Heck, my site visits are quintuple what they usually are, thanks to you.

By: Bacchus

Bacchus — Tue, 08 Jun 2004 00:51:38 +0000

“But the pairing, to me, hardly seems unusual.”
That’s exactly the point I find curious. Your racialized viewpoint is not unusual, but it is (from my perspective) part of the problem, not part of the solution.
The history points you mention are ancient history. Yes, they reverberate. But adding to those reverberations is hardly the way to bring them to a swift end.
Until you can talk about human beings without feeling the compulsion to flag them with racial identity tags, race is a problem in your world. When you can learn to do that, it will be not so big a problem.
I don’t want to live in a world where people need to be slotted into neat little racial boxes. And I don’t think I live in such a world. Every time I meet someone who does think so, I find it…curious.