Sex Blog Smearjob
Anybody in the blogging world is by now familiar with the tired old newspaper column written by a journalist who’s decided it’s time to say “I don’t get blogging, blogs are dull / stupid / inane / written by geeks.” Well, now a British journalist has trotted out that weary formula and plugged in “sex blog” instead of “blog”, writing Sex Blogs: Why Bother? A few sample paragraphs:
I can always just go and pick another of the thousands upon thousands of sex blogs that seem to be girding their loins and penetrating the blogosphere; because let’s face it, they all read the same. It’s all “tensed muscles” this and “moist undercarriage” that: graphic details of the precise curl of some anonyknobber’s merkin and five hundred variants on the concept of “sweaty”.
…
Other personal bloggers choose to write about tube trains and cats and cheese sandwiches; why shouldn’t you write about your own – and I apologise for this in advance – rides, pussies and yes, the contents of your very own lunchbox? Especially, and this must be said, especially when, for a bunch of geeks, you all seem to have rather unbounded sexual proclivities.
Perhaps that’s it. Perhaps I just can’t stand to read because I’m jealous. I’m jealous that a growing community of bloggers want to stand on a table, face the world and shout “Look at me! I’ve got a stiffy!”. I just don’t know what I’m supposed to say in return, except perhaps “Well, good for you.”
Sometimes I’m tempted to start up my own anti-sex-blog-blog. None of these glistening thighs and unbelievable multiple orgasms that go on for hours, pits that smell like flowers and sex that never goes wrong – it’ll be called “Fanny-Farts and the Jackhammer Rhythm” – and be a group blog full of tales of bloated post-takeaway sex, grumpy come-on-we’re-supposed-to-be-at-my-mum’s-by-now sex, and sex that you regret as soon as the first button is shucked but do it anyway.
Because what the world needs is more bad sex, described by people whose sexual proclivities are safely and boringly “bounded”. Capital idea!
Shorter URL for sharing: http://www.erosblog.com/?p=1719
“Guardian” columns: because sometimes it’s so much more fun to hear yourself talk than research your topic. :-/
Erm, a couple of details here.
1) The person who wrote this article is a blogger herself (www.littleredboat.co.uk); not a journalist.
2) The title of the piece was not written by her and she wasn’t very happy about it.
3) She wasn’t slagging off sexblogs in their entirety (she has me on her blogroll, for example)
4) I understand, through her additions in the comment box of that piece – http://commenti...94624 that she was attempting to question her own discomfort with reading about sex, rather than attacking people for writing about sex per se.
5) I still think people need to loosen up about sex though – and that goes for the writer, Anna, too. It’s 2006: reading about sex should be as relaxed as reading about knitting. Just perhaps that the former has more enjoyable pricks involved.
Quote from her article:
And how come they all seem like they’re having better sex than me?
Because we are. :)
“Because when you’ve got the whole internet laid out at your feet, who cares about Real Sex?”
I care. You see, the internet is the biggest library ever. Its wealth of information is priceless. Sure one must wade through missinformation and marketing to get to the good stuff but truly personal experiences must be worth more than sex-fiction. We only live once. And while I cannot say that sex-blogs have taught me how to be a better lover they sure have pointed me in the direction of valuable resources that have taught me to be a better lover and a better person through raised self confidence.
Pleasure is a good thing.
I actually agree with this journalist. A majority of sex blogs are boring, poorly-written, and overall generic. Most sex blogs I come across (no pun intended!) all literally sound identical to each other, with nothing to distinguish the blogger or the blogger’s ramblings from a sea of thousands of sex blogs. Worst of all are the sex bloggers who think they are original and daring just because they write about sex…even though humans have been writing about sex ever since they could draw on cave walls.
Only a handful of sex blogs are well-written, and have enough unique insights to make the blog worth reading regularly.
The Girl:
1) If her work appears in The Guardian, and she writes like a tired old-media hack, the word “journalist” fits.
2) The title was consistent with the work.
3) She *did* slag off sex blogs in their entirety; I didn’t see a positive comment about any sex blog in that article, though she did use you as a good example of someone with an authorial motivation she could approve of.
4) Her own discomfort about sex is certainly on display. But she surely does attack others for writing about sex, whatever she meant to do — calling sex bloggers “geeky”, and mocking them for standing on a virtual table shouting “I’ve got a stiffy.” Perhaps that mockery isn’t as strong in British English; in American English, “stiffy” is baby talk at best, and the implication is that sex bloggers are like four-year-olds who haven’t learned not to show their private parts to the dinner guests.
5) Agreed.
Lurking, trust me — as many sex blogs as I’ve read in the four years I’ve been doing this blog, I know that a great many of them are boring crap. It’s Sturgeon’s Law in action: 90% of everything is crap. But, ah, that other ten percent! That’s what we’re all looking for, and that’s what the quoted article entirely failed to recognize. She failed to acknowledge the existence of a single good sex blog, and there are, in fact, a great many. Which makes her look like she’s writing from a position of extreme ignorance.
Red, your point is exactly what I was getting at in my sarcasting ending sentences. Although I don’t do much sex writing on this blog, I do point to a lot of useful resources for better sex, and believe it or not, from time to time, I actually get thank you letters. So I know that sex blogging has the power to improve sex lives, because I’ve heard from people who say “I read XYZ and we tried it and it was wonderful, I never would have heard of it if you hadn’t linked to it!”
But of course, Anna-In-The-Guardian finds all this just too embarrassing in her veddy British fashion, so it must be bad.
To tell the truth; This is the only ‘blog’ I frequent; I have read many other blogs and sex-blogs and yes, a lot can be ” dull / stupid / inane / written by geeks.” In general if the writer of a blog isn’t blogging about topics that interest me then certainly the articles are inane. But the fact that a sex-blog is of a specific topic of interest to ‘its readers’ points to the contrary.
*In my geekiest voice*, “anne just got Owned in the face!”
Oh, I almost forgot. Maybe she’s just scorned because her sex-blog attempt didn’t get any traffic.
‘But no one will want to read it, of course.’
Just to clarify… not all of us Brits are prudish freaks, terrified of the idea of sweat and glistening… ive been reading this since i found it on the google homepage modifier thing a couple of months ago, and I enjoy it!
It’s kind of depressing that the author’s idea of real sex is such a letdown. Sure it’s not always perfect, but why focus on the negative?
Then again: Is it just me, or does anyone else think a sexual outtakes blog could be pretty funny, especially if it took reader submissions?
I can’t be the only sex blogger who accidentally sat down on a guy’s balls doing reverse cowgirl…
Point taken Bacchus; she should have recognized that like any type of blog or website, there are some worthwhile ones out there in an ocean of low quality crap. Perhaps she’s never been exposed to one of the decent ones. :)
I’d be interested in hearing what you all think distinguishes the good blogs from the bad. I just started blogging regularly for gvsextips and I always wonder whether people are actually getting something out of my rambling. Granted, ours is more about education than about randomly rambling about my own exploit but still…what distinguishes a blog as THE ONE to read?
That’s a huge question, WildChyld, much bigger than I can answer in the comments. One thing I can say, though, is that blogs like yours with a strong commercial marketing identity are very difficult to do well. People are suspicious and slow to link because they feel (rightly) that they are just giving you free advertising, in an adult market where paying for traffic is the norm. Obviously this can be overcome with compelling content, but the best sex blogs tend to be intensely personal and durable over long periods of time — something that’s very tough to do in a corporate environment.
I’ll give your question some thought, it may be time for a highly-opinioned “What makes a good sex blog?” article.
i blog because i can.
i have been keeping a journal since 1973. i grew up in a completely dysfunctional household and found that getting my thoughts down really helped me to move past whatever was eating at me.
that being said, i have cum to realize that putting down on paper, what can only be read by those that know me, is quite hazardous to my health (and well being.) upon discovering my sexual side (and all the ensuing adventures), i have cum to see that perhaps the cyberworld is a better place for my thoughts. more damage control. plus an opportunity to be bawdy, anonymous, and reflective…
my recently discovered brain tumor has only reinforced the need to get my thoughts down and out, before i can’t. i am seeking to fill my hungry heart before my opportunity is lost forever…
Well I think the article is funny. Sometimes I forget that a large portion of the world is rather boring sexually. I really wouldn’t expect them to get the whole sex blogging concept.
I’m so happy though to have found the blogging community and found like minded people! Who cares what the rest think? You know?
hugs
Des