Then there was this guy I dated for a while, and it’s the only relationship I’ve ever had the problem of not enough sex for me. By the end of the relationship I’d found out he was an alcoholic, smoked a lot of pot (never around me – one of his best friends told me) and he masturbated an average of 3 times a day. Given some of what I know was going on in his life – which he wasn’t dealing with – I think he was addicted to the alcohol, pot and masturbation as a way to ignore his problems (mainly financial and health). If he’d been taking care of these issues in his life, the alcohol, pot and masturbation wouldn’t appear to be addictions, to me at least.

Anything can become an addiction, and for me, knowing if I’ve crossed the line from “normal” to “addicted” ins only known in the context of what’s going on in my life and if I’m avoiding or dealing with whatever challenges I have going on.

Nailed. Or as we gun-clingers call it, ‘dead right there.’

In light of this observation, how often will you use the term ‘vanilla’ in the future?

I think the sex addiction mantra will eventually go the way of abstinence education and the intelligent design thrust; they just cannot exist in our oxygen rich atmosphere. None of these attempts at policy change could stand against neither rational thought, nor the test of time and eventually fell to the way side and inevitably failure.

Those that are trapped in the idea that they have a problem will feel something is wrong with their treatment (since it is not addressing any real issues) and will sabotage either their relationships or their therapy; something will have to give. That combined with a power struggle over letting sex addiction into the books (if it even makes it that far), I don’t see it surviving long.

That’s not to say that we shouldn’t speak out any time we see an injustice, I just see this problem addressing itself. It’s hard to see when personalities like Tyra Banks and Opera are acting like nothing is out of the ordinary when it comes to this. I personally think it’s irresponsible of them; they should be asking tougher questions.

It gives a handy toolbox to the sex-negative types — the same folks who, as you mention, used to spread lies about hair palms.

Just like to fireman, who’s called to get the old lady’s cat out of the tree, replies, “Lady we don’t do that anymore. He’ll come down on his own. After all, have you ever seen a skeleton of a cat up in a tree?”, personally, I’ve never heard of a sex addict who starved himself to death, because he couldn’t stop having sex.

I think it’s mostly heard when publicists or public relations people are using it to try to spin some controversial behavior by those who’s lives are in the public eye.

If were going to start labeling sexual frequency then we may have to bring back the idea of the frigid wife. It’s just as fair to pin the problem on her. The name-calling is pretty much counter-productive.

The couple is most likely suffering from a mere difference in desire. To roughly paraphrase another comedian: “Anyone who’s on the highway and drives slower than me, is a proverbial “little old lady” out for a Sunday drive, an unskilled driver who should have stayed home, rather than make me curse at them on the road. Anyone who drives faster than me is a speed demon and a menace on the highway who’s license should be yanked!” Who’s really got the problem here?

What we often have here is a manifestation of some other problem in the relationship, or else a poorly matched couple to begin with.

Note to Susie Bright: Oprah, by the way, has her OWN agenda, but then I’m sure you already know that. It would however, do her followers good to realize this, and keep that concept in mind…

The one thing that may come out of the media’s current obsession with the idea (thanks to people like tiger woods and jesse james) is that it’s inspiring people with a clue to actually say “wait hang on, that’s not real.”

The media focus on the topic, while currently destructive, may eventually raise the general visibility of the clinical consensus that sex addiction doesn’t actually exist.

Ok, maybe that’s wishful thinking, but one has to hope for some forward movement in enlightenment, even in the face of waves of puritan nonsense in the dime-store media.

I’m just really happy to see coherent, well-written pieces like Dr Klein’s getting some attention.