Why Bards Have More Fun (And Babies)
All observers of the human condition know that a good musician never has any trouble getting laid. It turns out there’s now scientific proof that the ladies really do want to jump a musician’s bones. The better the musician, the harder they jump! But there’s a catch: They only want him when “the risk of conception is at its highest”. They want your babies, musical gentlemen!
This new knowledge comes from British research reported in The Telegraph:
The study involved nearly 1,500 women with an average age of 28, who were not breastfeeding, pregnant or using hormonal contraception.
A group of women were asked whether they would prefer the composer of one simple melody, or a second more complex piece.
In each case they were asked whether they would prefer the composer as a short-term sexual partner, or a longer-term partner in a committed relationship.
The results showed that women only preferred composers of more complex music as short-term sexual partners when the risk of conception was at its highest, according to the study.
The same trend did not emerge when women were asked about visual artists, according to Benjamin Charlton, the paper’s author.
The study, published in The Proceedings Of The Royal Society B, could account for the early origins of music and why creative individuals are considered so desirable for short-term sexual relationships.
The researchers believe it provides the first scientific support for Charles Darwin’s theory that the prime function of music is to aid sexual courtship.
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I would theorize that over the millennia, this would greatly increase musical ability and music appreciation throughout the populace. This would explain why we turn our rock gods into millionaires, by attending their concerts and buying their recordings.
John Lennon was once interviewed about their early (Beatles) life on the road with groupies (George Harrison once wrote a tribute song about the girls hanging around Apple’s recording studios, called “Apple Scruffs”), and Lennon said something like “I won’t go into any great details here, due to respect for the feelings of the other guys’ wives, but I would describe it as often times like an orgy in the Fellini film ‘Satyricon’ “.
Perhaps one of your readers can find the original quote.
The B in Proceedings of the Royal Society B stands for Boogie.
I will note that there is no level of performing musician so low in the pecking order that he won’t attract significant female attention. I speak from experience. I say “he” because women seem to have no problem attracting male attention under any circumstances. I’m not saying you’ll meet your dream date, gents, but if you aren’t having any luck meeting women, learn to play the bass guitar (it’s easy!) and join a band. Your luck will improve immediately. And you’ll have a lot of fun in the bargain.
I ALWAYS go for the musicians. I thought it was because I am a musician myself (shared interests=compatibility), but I guess it was a baser desire. There’s a reason why they put sex, drugs, and rock’n’roll together (and sex, I’m sure, is a drug).