October 13th, 2004 -- by Bacchus
Post House, Ergo Propter House
“J” from The Orgy indentifies a speculative link between buying a house and decreased blowjob frequency:
My friend J2 mentioned that, since he and his girlfriend have bought a house, he’s noticed a marked decrease in blowjobs received.
I half-expected him to pull out a flip-chart with a graph on it.
Given the increasing infrequency with which I receive oral sex, I can’t imagine what might happen if the wife and I buy a house of our own.
How about it, all you real estate magnates out there? Has this happened to you? And have you got a chart to prove it?
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Shorter URL for sharing: http://www.erosblog.com/?p=1433
Shorter URL for sharing: http://www.erosblog.com/?p=1433
Unless you buy the house as a single guy, then things are on the up and up.
Not that I got many before, but since the girlfriend and I bought a house it is zero. :( :(
definate corilation
Hmmm. Me and the wife have owned a house since we got married. That explains it then. :(
What a terrifying revalation!
The best and most sex you will ever get is just before you marry or by a house. It will never ever get better again. A sad but simple fact.
I concur, definite correlation. I have a theory on this too. Once a woman has lured her mate and secured a viable nesting site, her focus turns to filling it with offspring. Oral sex is discarded for vaginal intercourse for the purposes of achieving conception.
I wouldn’t worry about missing oral sex though. Once you have children you’ll hardly ever get laid and your entire sex life will be centered around mere memories anyway.
Speaking from my own female experience…. I love giving a blowjob — love pleasuring my mate… But I don’t like being taken for granted either. Fellatio diminishes in direct proportion to my experience of being appreciated. Appreciation can include equal time on my body. So while you’re examining your losses, consider this… Are you giving your mate equal tongue time? Or could she throw up her own chart…?
There can be other problems with buying a house… read about ours here
I have to concur as well. Became rare when we married, dropped to zero when after we bought the house.
On the giving side, it used to be about 2-3 times a week before marriage, about the same after, and has slowly declined to about once every 2 months since we got the house.