October 1st, 2010 -- by Bacchus
Chasing Lost Vegetables
I did not make up this caption. I am just quoting it where I found it:
“I told you, if you want to borrow my buttplugs, go ahead. This is the LAST time I’m getting a cucumber out of there for you.”
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Shorter URL for sharing: http://www.erosblog.com/?p=5597
Shorter URL for sharing: http://www.erosblog.com/?p=5597
It occurred to me (after reading this), what an interesting read it would make, if some blog-master with the investigative chops and/or some sort of an erotic writing pedigree, were to be able to score an off-the-record interview with some old-timer in the Emergency Room at a major hospital like University of California San Francisco Medical Center or San Francisco General Hospital about the number, and variety, of objects removed from the rectums of patients over a period of years…
Just to tempt you, I’m guessing it might read like this:
“Oh, over the last decade alone, we’ve removed over a hundred light bulbs, bottles, ballpoint pens, golf balls, wooden darning eggs (http://bpics.ru...pg?79), broken off sausages…”
Inquiring minds want to know!
It’s kinda been done — see this post, the Russian hospital “trophy wall” photo there, and the famous “rectal foreign bodies” page linked from there.
The rectal foreign bodies page in particular is an internet classic.
My list wasn’t ambitious enough. Here I am guessing at golf balls (thinking I was so smart for not stopping at imagining mere ping-pong ball size…), and of course the list of ACTUAL found objects included billiard balls, tennis balls, baseballs, apples and the like.
Judging by the multiple accountings of flashlights, I also missed in imagining a whole category that should have been a no-brainer. Same with screwdrivers, which probably provided a few hours of frightening trepidation following the initial “uh-oh” moment (not to mention that listing of the ice pick!…)
However, I do refuse to apologize for failing to imagine the denture, which I noticed in the Winchell Collection of X-rays.
I also failed to guess an artillery shell, and if I had, I’m sure I would have failed to imagine that it would need to be diffused before removal. What a story! After reading that one, I thought surely I had heard it all, until I read the one about the 8 cm diameter peanut butter jar, and the ingenious way in which it was removed…