The Quest For Peachy Vaginas

Thursday, November 20th, 2014 -- by Bacchus

Not for nothing is a certain breed of California tech entrepreneur derisively called “douche bros”. According to Inc. Magazine, a couple of these douche bros showed up at a tech/venture-capital dog and pony show yesterday to announce their “plans for a new probiotic supplement that will enable women to change the way their vaginas smell”. Using already-controversial synthetic biology technology, the bros claim that their “Sweet Peach” product “will have practical benefits, like preventing yeast infections and other health problems caused by microorganisms.” “The idea is personal empowerment,” one of the bros said. “All your smells are not human. They’re produced by the creatures that live on you.”

It is perhaps revealing that their other proposed product is “a probiotic for dogs and cats that makes their feces smell like bananas.”

When challenged by the Inc. reporter to explain why “feminine odor” was the target of their venture, the other bro claimed that the peach smell was really just a sort of diagnostic. “”It tells us where the protein is expressed,” he said. “What, would you rather have it glow?”

Me, I’m praying for this product to fail early and often. I’m on record: I like the smell of pussy. Plus, I agree with the gentleman here: “If you don’t love pussy THIS MUCH you are not big enough to get on this ride.”

If I want peaches, I’ll go to a farmer’s market.

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