May 4th, 2004 -- by Bacchus
Cheaper Than A RealDoll
From Savage Love, a letter in praise of stiff plastic lovers:
“Being with a mannequin is better than being with another person. (I like to think of myself as half of a mannequpple.) They put out and they do whatever you want.”
Whatever you want? I guess that’s true, if “whatever you want” is limited to having a lover who is lifeless and cold and just lays there doing nothing at all. [Unhappily married men may wish to substitute a crass joke about their wives for the text currently within these brackets.]
There’s also detailed advice on how to steal (yes, steal) the other half of your mannequpple.
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Ha! I am sure I am not the only female that could name a mannequin after a former lover that had about as much personality and equal moves in the bedroom! Women are not the only ones that just lay there. Men can do that too!
me too sarah! I couldn’t believe it when it happen, he didn’t even make facial expressions, just some sly smile and after riding him for 45 minutes i fell over exuhausted saying how i couldn’t do anymore only to hear him say “you can do anything if you try” what the fuck! Hell in this case a mannequin would of been way better.
Me three. Dead man with an erection; I thought I was in the middle of a Clive Barker novel. I would have preferred him chilled, just for the fun of it.