Anybody who has ever played any Dungeons and Dragons (or, probably, any other relatively freeform role-playing game) has probably spoken or heard uttered that immortal phrase “I’ll distract the guardsmen and then…” But how, exactly, is the distraction of the guards to be accomplished?

Methods vary. But here’s one surefire way, especially when discipline is lax:

distracting some friendly but not very alert guards with oral sex

Art is by Calm, whose work is Patreon-supported.

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