Fumbling Ignorantly In The Dark
Tuesday, February 7th, 2012 -- by Bacchus
People interested in the sexual experiences of those raised in subcultures hostile to sexuality may be interested in this account (popup warning) by a former member of the “the ultra-conservative Hasidic Satmar community”. She talks about sex on her wedding night with her (arranged) husband:
No one ever said the word “sex,” or even “vagina,” to me. We had no clue. We were like, “It’ll work out.” It never worked out. There is an actual rule that you learn before you get married that you are never supposed to look at genitalia. You can’t look at yours, and you can’t look at his. It’s always dark. There’s no hole in the sheet, but it’s pitch dark and there’s no looking and there’s a lot of fumbling around, and you’re wearing your nightgown rolled up to your waist. There’s no boob touching. Mine were totally wasted! There is no oral sex. After the first time, you have to call a rabbi and he asks the man questions – did this happen? And he declares you either unclean, or not yet consummated. Once you’re consummated, you’re unclean, because you bled. So after the first time, your honeymoon is a no-sex period.