The top seven signs your grandparents remain sexually active:

7. At night they put their teeth in the same glass.

6. Grandpa grabs his crotch and complains loudly of “denture-burn.”

5. Not only do you hear the bed squeaking, but also joints.

4. Grandma is found cuffed to her walker.

3. Grandma regularly bakes Viagra-chip cookies.

2. Grandma frequently looks at Grandpa’s crotch and claps twice.

And the number one sign your grandparents remain sexually active is:

1. Their Kraft-matic adjustable bed is set for “doggy style.”