Enforcing The Social Contract
There’s a video up at Atlanta Bondage under the title Can’t A Girl Pee In Peace? (Backup link.) I’m not going to re-publish it here, because it’s not, to my eye, erotic, nor funny either. However, it has some interesting social implications that aren’t likely to get mentioned anywhere else, there not being very many places that combine occasional social analysis with comfort in referencing a video clip featuring bare boobies and mildly kinky porn.
The “girl” in question is pretty clearly, to my eye at least, a model for one of the many porn sites that cater to the public urination fetish (subfetish category: women squatting to pee in the public streets). This model is bare breasted, smiling, and squatted-down right in the middle of some sort of street or public way (perhaps a wharf, or pedestrian mall). Here’s a cropped still from the beginning of the clip, in which I’ve highlighted the villain of the piece, to whom I am semi-arbitrarily assigning a male pronoun:
In the clip, he strides forward and kicks our incontinent heroine solidly in the ass, nearly knocking her over. The remainder of the clip shows her steadying herself with a hand, then turning and standing up to confront her attacker.
So, what’s going on here, and why is it interesting?
As it happens, I just read a piece by Chuck Klosterman in Esquire magazine about declining interest in professional boxing. As Klosterman explains it, people have lost interest in the sport of boxing because they no longer have a visceral relationship with the idea of hitting people or getting hit. A fine theory about which I have little opinion, never having been a fan myself of hitting people or being hit or watching big burly dudes do either one. But I was fascinated by Klosterman’s next line of speculation:
Now, I realize all of this is (obviously) more good than bad. I’m happy that avoiding physical confrontation has become so easy that I don’t even have to think about it. But I wonder: If the decline of boxing is the product of civilization’s detachment from physical fear, what is the accompanying downside? I think one possible answer might be a depressing brand of social overconfidence.
It is impossible to deny that the culture is coarsening. Everyone concedes this — even the people who are happy about it. It is now acceptable to say almost anything, about almost anyone, in a public space, and for no reason whatsoever. There is no line to step over, because such lines no longer exist. And I think those boundaries disappeared the moment people really, truly lost the fear of getting punched in the face. Americans have understood this intellectually for decades, but I don’t think we accepted it in totality until now. Adults are now so insulated by technology (and so protected by modernity) that the possibility of a physical consequence for any action is a psychological nonfactor. We have removed interpersonal fear from day-to-day behavior. Today, boxers are the only people who get hit for fucking up.
So, what does this have to do with our punted piddle-princess? Everything! His foot hitting her ass is a classic example of generation-gapped cultural conflict.
By my own lights, the peeing porn starlet was misbehaving. People who enjoy seeing girls peeing in public have a fetish, a modestly rare one. Most everybody else doesn’t want to see it, and they surely don’t want to step in it, or walk around it. At best, it’s horribly rude and socially transgressive to be doing what she was doing. Responsible pornographers would secure a movie set and provide sufficient extras to achieve the same visual effect without imposing their fetish on unwilling passers-by. And they would hire a dude with a mop, to clean up after.
I think it’s fair to speculate further that she and her photographer knew she was violating the social contract, but were sanguine about getting away with it. They probably worried about police intervention — perhaps they had a spotter watching for cops and ready to call a warning — but I suspect that it never occurred to her that any of the passers-by upon whom she was imposing her bare breasts and pussy and urine stream would take physical action against her to interrupt or to punish the imposition. People of her generation, or mine, just don’t do that sort of thing.
But our man (and I do think it’s a man, but I’m not sure) with the crazed white Einstein hair and the armload of files is not from our generation. He’s from a generation in which people cared a lot more about public propriety, and frequently took it upon themselves to enforce it with direct action. Doubtless he was offended by some half-naked [four letter term of derision] pissing in his path. Doubtless he considered he was doing a public service by applying a swift kick in the ass to both interrupt and punish the breach of the social contract. I have no doubt he felt good about doing it, and the way he stops and squares his stance after the kick suggests that he was ready to do it again if need be, or to stay and defend his actions otherwise. If we had an audio track, we’d be hearing somebody getting a piece of his mind about now.
So, who is really the villain of the piece? The pisser, or the kicker?
I’d like to weasel out with “a pox on both their houses”, but I need to acknowledge that it’s really not quite that simple. The trouble with enforcing social contracts with fists and feet is that social contracts aren’t really contracts, and they tend to get made up on the spot by cultural bigots and then enforced on people who never consented to them. (Don’t believe me? Ask Matthew Shepard.) I don’t really want people in my society feeling free to piss on my toes for profit, but I’m a lot more worried about living in a society where disagreements about appropriate public behavior get “settled” by sudden assault.
So, I guess my bottom line is, ix-nay on the ass-kicking. But I do agree with Klosterman that by creating a world where the ass-kicking is improbable, we’ve also created a world full of people who feel free to (metaphorically, most days) pee on your toes and tell you to go fuck yourself. That’s good more often than it’s bad, but it’s definitely a mixed blessing.
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Perhaps this goes another step beyond that in that usually people who get pissed on and told to go fuck themselves with no immediate (or realistically any) recourse feel more and more powerless. At that point society begins to encode these “social contracts” into law, but with, of course, our American need for puritanical rule they go too far, are enforced to the letter of the law, rather than the spirit of the law…
Yikes.
As for the ass-kicking, had the kicker put enough force to cause some kind of physical harm or pain, I think the argument that he’s using violence to put forth his cause might be made, but as it is I think it’s tenuous. I would argue he’s using public embarrassment, ironically enough, more than violence.
The woman peeing was uninjured except for embarrassment. Had she finished and been kicked while walking away, I would find his actions less acceptable, but I find it difficult to argue that his rather mild physical contact with someone currently peeing in the middle of a public sidewalk, for personal gain no less, is over the top.
Interesting article. As a long-time pacifist, I am certainly opposed to settling disputes by violence. However, having moved to Texas some years ago, I noticed that people here are quite a bit more courteous than on the coasts, and I wonder what that might have to do with a tradition (more cultural history than actual fact) of people carrying guns. One tends to be courteous around people with guns.
On the other hand, guns tend to lead to fatal confrontations. Whereas a kick in the ass, or a punch in the face, is likely to be startling, moderately painful, and humiliating, but not fatal or even injurious in the long term.
I’m a big fan of the freedoms this country provides, and certainly the ones this blog endorses. But freedoms and responsibilities actually do go together. Perhaps we don’t actually sign a social contract on birth, but there is one nonetheless, even if it is unwritten (like the British constitution). And if you don’t like this one, you should perhaps move somewhere that has one you like more. (That’s how a lot of Texans got here in the 19th century.)
This is very far from saying, “Support conservative politics or leave the country”, a position I abhor. But it does say, “There is a social contract. If you don’t like it, you can work to change it (with all the costs of that approach), or you can leave.” In my humble opinion, pissing on the public streets is outside that contract. (Booting a stranger in the ass might be, too, of course.)
Well what’s really happening is the birth of a whole new sub-sub-fetish … of guys kicking girls squatting to pee in the street in the ass.
Greetings-
I neither found it erotic nor funny, either. The title was sarcastic commentary of the indignant nature of her act and the surprise that she displayed when the gentleman (yes, I’m assuming he’s a male, but am not totally sure either) exercised what he believed was his right to intervene and administer some sort of on-the-spot street justice.
The category I assigned was Humor/Oddities. The latter is where this fell in my mind. It stands alone in my recollection of someone making this type of social effacing porn and being stopped from completing it. I assume that’s part of the power of such stuff… the fact they are “getting away” with it and in this case, she didn’t completely. In fact, now she is on display before an even larger audience than originally she would have ever reached as part of a scene that didn’t tolerate it.
Interesting take on the piece, though, and I do agree that it provides excellent juxtaposition of the values, in general, of the generations represented. A perfect corollary is how society has changed its view on corporal punishment. It is much more widely accepted today for people to hit each other for sexual pleasure, but to do so for the purpose of conditioning “better” behavior is practically extinct.
I was also struck by the thought that giving the clip this additional attention is something of an equivalent to internet rubber-necking. “I don’t want to post it (because it doesn’t meet my blog’s standards of eros or humor), but look…”
On that note, thanks for the additional traffic.
-M
Beard, that’s what’s so interesting about the idea of a social contract. You and I might agree that it forbids pissing in the street, but differ about whether it covers, say, spitting. (Saliva? Chewed gum? Tobacco juice? Big green festering loogies of infectious sinus butter? As to at least some of these, we don’t have a broad social consensus.)
Everybody assumes they know what the social contract is, but no two people agree on it in every particular. That tends to make a mockery of the “conform or leave” arguments.
No, I didn’t take your comments as criticism at all. At the same time, it wouldn’t be a stretch for that inference to be taken by some, so I took the opportunity to put the post in some additional context, since it was being held up to the light.
I wasn’t trying to tweak at all. I was just expressing my initial impression, to which you provided additional clarity, as well.
M, it’s dangerous trying to get vibes from internet prose, but I’m getting the vibe from your comment that you felt critiqued for posting the thing. If so, I apologize — I was trying to explain why it wasn’t in the categories of things I usually post on ErosBlog, not trying to suggest that my posting policy should be followed anywhere else or would even be appropriate in another place.
Everybody who has a blog has an implicit or explicit editorial policy. Departures from mine sometimes get explained, but there’s nothing in the explanations that should be seen as criticism of the credited link.
If your last paragraph is trying to tweak me for wimpy compromises, for linking to something I’m not comfortable presenting as eroticism, well, I plead guilty. I’m not comfortable presenting that clip in my usual “here’s an erotic thing to look at” mode, but I still think it’s worth discussing on Eros Blog. Rubbernecking in the real world, though, is condemned as a hazard to other drivers; on the internet, I don’t quite see the harm. It’s not like I’m arguing that nobody should view this clip, I’m just saying I personally don’t want to hold it up as an erotic artifact.
You’re welcome for the traffic!
By my own lights, the peeing porn starlet was misbehaving. People who enjoy seeing girls peeing in public have a fetish, a modestly rare one. Most everybody else doesn’t want to see it, and they surely don’t want to step in it, or walk around it. At best, it’s horribly rude and socially transgressive to be doing what she was doing. Responsible pornographers would secure a movie set and provide sufficient extras to achieve the same visual effect without imposing their fetish on unwilling passers-by. And they would hire a dude with a mop, to clean up after.
That I definitely agree with–and I’m in the subset of people who’ve been known to find peeing highly erotic. However, there is a time and a place for my pleasures, and when it breaches other peoples’ rights to not see urine, nudity, and sexuality, that is not the right time and not the right place. Also, any mess you make you ought to clean up!
I think it’s safe to say a social contract was violated when someone is actively caught breaking the law and a quick google indicates that public urination is illegal in many areas.
I particularly like this comment from http://abclocal...79823 regarding a case in San Francisco: “Emptying one’s bladder in a public place is a crime, even if there is no specific law prohibiting the practice, a state appeals court ruled.”
I instantly thought as I watched the “swift kick in the ass” he delivered to her – my grandfather would have done that exactly so with no hesitation.
Eve
Interesting.
First thing that struck me was that she had better not try this in a mainly ethnic area. In South Texas, the local barrio, etc the kick is very mild to what would happen. Interestingly boxing is still popular in many of those places, as is wrestling. Also with many blue collar areas… small rural places can be very violent too. In Laredo Texas for example on any Friday night you can see a half dozen fist fights or worse.
I think in terms of the social contract, there is a difference in degree. Public urination has health issues, as does spitting. The former is also illegal… I think the latter might still be. One could maybe argue degree of risk. Either way, that’s a big difference from disapproving of PDAs by anyone – which is how I was raised and a bigger difference from someone’s orientation. I have a hard time disapproving of that kick I guess. But then again, I boxed…
Beard, Depends where you are in Texas, no? In small towns, many people do still carry guns. The local clothing store where I live routinely fits jackets to cover a gun…
“It is impossible to deny that the culture is coarsening…”
I disagree. People are less likely to physically assault each other on the street than ever before. This represents social progress to me. :-)
It’s rude, inconsiderate and violates every public health law I can think of. Did she use tp? Or wash her hands afterwards? Doubt that! ;-) Does endangering the health of the community somehow alter the terms of the social contract?
I would have given her a swift kick in the ass as well; and I’m a pretty laid back middle aged female.
i placed the gif, had fun watching it.and got a shitload even more funnier.
Take a wild gues it is made in the usa during a redneck white trailerpark car race. Only in America , be proud be proud.
There was a controversy in Chicago this summer when the cops were cracking down on gay sex in the bushes in the city parks, in some area near heavily traveled attractions. An article in the local gay newspaper claimed that the “transgressive” nature of certain acts were an essential part of gay sexuality, and policing this quasi-public activity was thus homophobic.
My problem with such a formulation is that is makes everyone else, from children on up, merely extras in somebody’s psychodrama. If I believe in a person’s right to be homosexual, does this perforce mean that must support any activity in any venue, to protect their feelings? What about my feelings, or those of people with different opinions? The old saw says that your right to swing your arm stops at my nose; certainly your right to commit certain acts stops when you impinge on my location.
The kicker was not breaking into the pisser’s backyard. She was clearly trying to commit a transgressive act, and her indignation over somebody not playing along with the fantasy is comical. Maybe the kicker’s act was a form of performance art.
I boxed professionally for ten years.Crowds and television audiences show up for a fight because they want to see a battle.They want to see a war and there is nothing wrong with that.Recently however,they havent had that one dynamic fighter that they feel will give that to them.
Klosterman is only partially right if he believes that fans used to watch boxing matches as a visceral connection with hitting or being hit.The decline in numbers has more to do with the rise of MMA and the lack of a cross-over fighter in the mold of a Sugar Ray Leonard who captured the casual fan’s interest.Boxing will be back when that cross-over fighter is found.
I dont feel that the average person on the street fears being hit less in this more(supposedly)civilized society.I think possibly an attacker might feel less entitled and more selective in their choices of confrontations. Consider the possibilities of the same scenario if the’pisser’ was a burly fellow with tattoos and and a scowl.Would our elderly kicker have the same urge to split the uprights?Would he have acted on it?
I am not speaking of right and wrong here,as I would certainly snicker if I had been at the scene of this particular field goal attempt.I just think our elderly friend knew that a tongue lashing would be as much as he would get from that particular young lady.
Bacchus,
I love your comments and I totally agree with you all the way around. “A pox on both their houses!” Cheers.
Well one thing is for absolute certain. The kicker is a male.
The rest – very interesting. The “social overconfidence” issue being abetted by a lack of fear of physical retaliation theory could indeed have merit. Think of “road rage” – would people behave better on the roads if they still thought it was likely that another person would get out of their car and smack them? Of course, I’m in Australia where that kind of thing is less frequent (although it’s becoming popular) than I understand it may be in certain parts of America.
The solution is elusive. We don’t want to revert to a society where you’re apt to get your nose broken by some bigot who thinks it’s okay to impose his mores on the public at large – but at the same time I think a little more social reserve might be a good thing. A touch more consideration for others, a touch more tolerance and patience would improve the world, no?
Hmm, the comments on politeness in TX remind me of the corollaries on crime & gun control in various countries. If there are consequences, people stop & think. I think she opened herself up to any possible response. Personally, if I had been there, I probably would have called the cops on her until I saw the guy boot her in the butt. If she had been a “bum” peeing on the side of the building, people would have called the cops on her. I don’t think she should get away with illegal behavior just because she is a pretty lady. If women want equality, they need to stop trading on their looks to get away with behavior. Now, would I have called the cops if it was a closed shoot & I heard about it? Probably not. Would I have written to complain? Yeah, probably. It’s unsanitary. Peeing as sex, not my thing but personal kink should remain personal. The best way to get respect is to give it to others first. Enjoy yourself, but don’t infringe on others nonconsensually. Especially, in an illegal fashion. You open yourself up to consequences.
A few years back in my “town”, a free outdoor concert was held, which was open for all ages. There was an enormous line for the inadequate number of portable outhouses, and lots of beer being served. One extremely attractive young lady left the waiting-line, and sauntered over to a nearby shade tree, lifted her miniskirt a bit, and tinkled into the mulch. She made no effort to exhibit herself, and little to conceal her actions. Before she rose, she gave her hips a perfunctory shake (…as she had no paper) and as she stood, the crowd gave an encouraging round of applause. The act didn’t bother me, except that I found it amusing, and somewhat erotic…