And speaking, as I just was, of how things were done before the invention of the internet:

THIS is how they used to take a photograph of a pussy.

I’m not saying it was better, exactly. I’m not one of those living-in-the-past “in my day, sonny” people, oh no. Far be it from me to denigrate the dramatic progress of the pornographic arts and sciences.

But it sure was different.

Sonny, you know what they used to call a picture like that? “Split beaver”, I shit you not. I don’t miss that one little bit. Pornographic rodent metaphors, happily, are as dead as 8-track players.