March 30th, 2023 -- by Bacchus
Husbands Who Don’t Understand The Assignment
The least joyous thing I’ve seen today is a social media video under #CouplesHumor #MarriedHumor hashtags, where some dudebro husband tried to enact that riddle-meme of asking/answering the “what do deli sandwiches and sex workers have in common?” for spousal reaction. I’ve actually seen some funny ones, where the misogynistic “I wouldn’t need either one, if my wife was doing her fucking job!” punchline landed well and got a reaction of honest amusement from the wife in question. But in this one? Her look of incomprehension, that slowly dawned into severely hurt feelings, was just heartbreaking. Dude, NOOO. You fucked up. You failed to read the room. Don’t post that shit!
No, I’m not going to link it. Nobody needs to see that cruel shit.
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Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=31072
Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=31072
One reason I don’t like big social media services is that they show how much willful ignorance and senseless cruelty there is in the world.
How many years have you been married Bacchus? Also, how did you and your wife meet?
What advice are you giving to wives and husbands based on your own time spent joined in wedlock?
The Nymph and I have for many years chosen against detailed online discussion of our relationship, but there are quite a few answers to your questions buried deep in the archives. As for advice, I always try to distinguish between my boneheaded opinions and actual advice. But I don’t mind saying that loyalty is pretty near the first duty of any spouse. If you aren’t first and foremost on their side, and they on yours, that’s bad. Causing your spouse pain may be inevitable — anybody can fuck up — but putting it on social media postured as funny? That’s not loyal enough.
I find that unsolicited advice to strangers says more about the advice giver than the topic. Any given relationship is with that special someone not GenericGuy/Gal ™. But if you try a joke and it deeply hurts someone you are close to, I think almost any wise person would suggest that the next step is ‘make amends’ not ‘use it to get imaginary Internet points.’
Vagans, yes, every word of that. True also of more minor hurts. Start with “Oooh, I’m sorry!” not “You should have seen your face, I’m uploading this right now.”
[…] into a few seconds and encoded in subtle variations of facial reaction and vocal tone. It’s terrible when it goes wrong, but a joyous art form when all goes well. And like most art, there’s gonna be people who […]