“Needs” and toys
I thought that someone would call me on my poorly-phrased comment in a recent post:
As someone who’s never had a need for sex toys (but that day is getting closer) …
Sure enough, TwiddlyBits gently did it, stating, “‘Need’ is such a relative word….” So now I’ve a good reason to elaborate.
I don’t have anything against sex toys. In fact, I’d love to have some nipple jewelry (no piercings for me, for weird health reasons). But I will confess to being somewhat bemused by the fondness some individuals seem to have for vibrators and such. It is a hard stretch (pun intended) for me to see how they can be better than sex with a person. I know, I know — they never get tired (or if they do, you can just pop fresh batteries in), they can do things humans can’t, and you don’t have to talk to them to try to get them to do exactly what you want — you just flip the switch or turn the dial, or whatever, and presto, the desired setting automagically takes one into orgasmic ecstasy.
I said I’ve never had a need for sex toys (meaning vibrators and dildos, specifically) because until now, I’ve never been without a willing sex partner for a significant period of time. Now that I am, and it seems likely to be that way for a long time, maybe some of you would be willing to educate me as to what I’m missing, on this subject.
Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=1449
Trying to imagine life without sex toys… Can’t do it. I’ve had a string of unimaginative, selfish, impotent and penisically-challenged (yep a new word!) lovers.
Yes, my fingers can do the deed on myself but sometimes it feels good to have something larger filling me up.
I can’t tell you the times I’ve used a toy to get off – multiple times before/after a date because I knew they weren’t gonna lead to my own pleasure.
Now, don’t get me wrong. If it was a choice between a nice hard cock or a night with Mr. Trusty (my fave vibe), it’d be a nobrainer – I’d go for the cock. (Mr.Trusty is an obedient one and would be waiting at home for me if things didn’t pan out!)
And if it weren’t for toys, I would have never known I could climax seven times in a row. (I’m gonna shoot for 8 next time!)
So, vive le Duracell!!!
” because until now, I’ve never been without a willing sex partner for a significant period of time”
Pardon my stupidity, but I thought you and Bacchus were an “item” and “doing it” on a regular basis. Obviously, I have gotten hold of the wrong end of the story?
Er, grainofsand, you must have me confused with his Sweetie, the Nymph.
More followup to everyone else later — for now, just my thanks for the perspectives! :D
My wife and I just got a vibrator and we’ve started to experiment. We’re starting slow, but she seems to like it so far. I’m interested in how it works for you
Sex toys are different, it’s a different experience and different people experience toys in different ways.
Me, I use sex toys frequently because if I didn’t, I’d never have an orgasm. And that’s not saying anything about my partner’s skill, it’s saying a lot more about my body’s inability to respond to anything but really strong simulation that a partner would have to be superhuman to provide.
You notice women will talk about dildo’s, but men never talk about those vibrating vagina sex toys. I wonder if lesbians buy them! :P
I’m surprised nobody has mentioned that they make a delightful addition to sex with a partner. I don’t view sex toys as a *replacement* for, but as a wonderful *complement* to a partner (or partners)! Sure, I use them solo, but DanglyBits & I are just as likely to use them together. We love them!!
Oh, one more thing – I never said toys were “better than sex with a person”. If I had to choose one or the other, I would choose sex with a person over sex with a toy. But, I don’t have to choose! I can do both – even at the same time!! :-)
Well, like Aphrodite (feels weird to call someone else that — it’s another of my identities), I usually have willing sex partners and so on, but I also have a decent collection of sex toys. I find they’re great for when I’m feeling somewhat lazy, or can’t see my partner for whatever reason, or they’re just fun to introduce during the action on their own.
I tend to prefer vibrators to dildos, and my collection really reflects that. :)
Some women swear by the rabbit type vibes. I’m more of a bullet girl. As far as dildos, I prefer thin tools with interesting shapes. I can’t get a comfortable fit with anything that is actually cock shaped. The basic goal for me isn’t to simulate human sex but to go beyond it. And like TwiddlyBits said, it definitely doesn’t have to be a solo sport.
“And if it weren’t for toys, I would have never known I could climax seven times in a row. (I’m gonna shoot for 8 next time!)”
And that is one reason why I’m very much into women who play with toys and know themselves and their bodies, being part of that kind of situation can be so much more fun than your standard “in-out, in-out”. I helped one ex realise her fantasy of becoming multi-orgasmic, but even willing a willing tongue and versatile fingers tire after such hard work (no matter how fun it is).
It’s a super efficient way to get off when you just need that release. Never thought of trying a vibrating vagina because it’s such an unappealing copy of something I want to see in reality connected to a live writhing body. Also, the cleanup process seems like way too much trouble.
I’m amazed by how quickly my little pocket rocket can have me spurting. Yeah, I’m a male and I put the tip of this little vibrator on that spot just beneath the head on the underside of the penis and it works even if I’m not that excited to begin with… It’s like something I can’t control is making me cum.
Thanks, everyone, especially TwiddlyBits, for your comments. Guess I’ve got an interesting shopping expedition ahead for myself!
Although, I did meet a cute guy two nights ago … :)