There’s more than one way to deal with an intrusive homeowner’s association (or, for that matter, with a husband who likes to spank):

The homeowners association sent me a letter… someone complained that my Rotts, Tank and Panda, were embarrassing them by making whoopee in the backyard in the middle of the day. Excuse me? I have a 7-foot wooden fence around the backyard. What was that person doing standing on a ladder peeking in?

“SAR!”

SWAT!

Tsk.

“And don’t tell them what we often do in the backyard in warmer weather.”

I wrote back that they should peek in around 7 p.m. when the giant squid and I are in the backyard and in the gazebo sharing a glass of wine. Sometimes we make whoopee out there. It would make for a better show. Tsk.

“SAR!”

SWAT!

Double Tsk.

From Pieces.