Theodora’s Trained Geese
I was reading this account of the Emperor Justinian’s debauched wife Theodora, and being struck by the pornographic attention to detail, I thought it might be worth reading the author’s Secret History in greater depth. (Thus does being a sex blogger lead, by strange mischances, to the study of classical texts.) Nor was I wrong:
Often, even in the theater, in the sight of all the people, she removed her costume and stood nude in their midst, except for a girdle about the groin: not that she was abashed at revealing that, too, to the audience, but because there was a law against appearing altogether naked on the stage, without at least this much of a fig-leaf.
Covered thus with a ribbon, she would sink down to the stage floor and recline on her back. Slaves to whom the duty was entrusted would then scatter grains of barley from above into the calyx of this passion flower, whence geese, trained for the purpose, would next pick the grains one by one with their bills and eat. When she rose, it was not with a blush, but she seemed rather to glory in the performance. For she was not only impudent herself, but endeavored to make everybody else as audacious. Often when she was alone with other actors she would undress in their midst and arch her back provocatively, advertising like a peacock both to those who had experience of her and to those who had not yet had that privilege her trained suppleness.
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I must commend to the attention of ErosBlog readers Chapter XL of Edward Gibbon’s _Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire_, wherein Gibbon devotes some very choice pages to “The Birth and Vices of Empress Theodora.”
Gibbon even explains Theodora’s “narrow girdle” in a footnote.
I am starting to think Theodora gets a bad rap
Yeah, she started out as a whore and may have indulge as queen….but i give her a miniscule benefit of a doubt
idk…….
She sounds as though she may have been either an adrenaline junkie, or a masochist, (or BOTH!)
Geese bites can be quite painful, even in a not-so-sensitive area…