This Mineral Is Not For Fucking
So it seems a lot of Tumblr is having a merry time discussing the fuckability of this mineralogical sample, to wit, a polished stalactite composed (more or less) of solid malachite:
You pretty much have to go read the whole thread. There’s some back and forth about whether malachite (which is a copper mineral) is toxic (conclusion: not really) but ultimately the real problem turns out to be that it dissolves pretty well under vagina conditions and in solution, the copper is not good for vaginal microbiota:
Ok so here’s the thing though
Malachite is not poisonous to YOU. BUT fucking this stalactite will probably wreck your vaginal flora and leave you with a gruesome infection within a couple days.
Want details? SO GLAD YOU ASKED, ‘CAUSE HERE THEY ARE.
– Malachite is not copper oxide. It’s Cu2CO3(OH)2. Like most carbonates it’s water soluble— that’s how it became a stalactite in the first place! And technically any given chunk of “malachite” isn’t just malachite— it’s a mix of various copper carbonates & oxides. This will become important later.
– When malachite dissolves it makes a bunch of copper (Cu++) ions. Cu++ is GREAT at killing bacteria and fungi— so good at it that sprays with Cu++ get used a lot as a spray in agriculture to stop plant disease. It takes such a large dose to harm larger organisms that copper sprays are used a lot in organic agriculture (like Bordeaux mixture).
So bottom line, yes malachite is technically nontoxic to humans. But it kills bacteria when it dissolves and releases Cu++.
– Malachite dissolves somewhat slowly in water— but vaginal secretions aren’t just any water. A healthy human vagina has a pH of 3.8-4.5 and a salinity of about 0.9%. It’s also warmer than your average underground cave at 37°C (or 98.5°F in American meat units). As luck would have it, acidity, salinity, and warmth all make malachite dissolve faster.
– In other words, the human vagina dissolves malachite.
– I have no deeper explanation for why human females can dissolve rocks with our genitals. It simply is.
The conversation continues. We may yet learn more!
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Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=16229
Hmm.. If you want it that bad, stick a condom on it?
But, having a vagina that can dissolve rocks is pretty cool. I never knew that.
Every day’s a school day!
A mere web image search will produce more malachite beads and necklaces than you can easily count.
I’m thinking about cheap metal jewelry’s reputation for turning one’s skin green, and I’m thinking WOW, those dissolving beads are going to give someone a nasty case of “ring-around-the-collar”…