Recently I saw a bitter complaint from an enlightened gentleman who correctly pointed out that trollish internet misogynists had deprived an entire generation of men. How? By inventing the derisive term “tramp stamp” for the sexy tattoos that women place in the small of their backs or right at the top of their butt cheeks. Such a sex-negative sobriquet has surely reduced the number of these tattoos on display whenever the weather is warm, or (even better) when it’s face-down-ass-up sexy-time in a bedroom near you.

I am ashamed to realize I accepted that judgmental nomenclature for many years without a second thought. But at least I didn’t contribute significantly to tramp-shaming; I can only find two ErosBlog posts with “tramp stamp” in them. Better yet, one of them features Donald Trump’s poorly-rendered ugly mug, and the other one put “tramp stamp” in scare quotes while addressing some issues the ancient Greeks may or may not have had with these tattoos.

Be all that as it may, I’m now delighted to learn that there’s a new, much more sex-positive nomenclature in town. These tattoos are tramp stamps no longer; the fun kids are calling them “cake toppers” now! And I, for one, welcome our new pastry-decorated overladies:

Self-described sassy redhead Juniper Anne says

Since tramp stamps are now being referred to as cake toppers, I’m thinking about getting one that says:

All you can eat carrot cake
Baked fresh daily
Homemade
For professional eaters only

But it’s a little long, and a little too forward. What do you think? Should I do it?

I’ll do it. Don’t tell me to do it. Okay, bye-bye.

Do it!

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