Therefore I will put my hook in your nose
And my bridle in your lips,
And I will turn you back
by the way which you came.

— 2 Kings 28

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You will have noticed that ErosBlog doesn’t dwell on the war. You want warnography, there’s plenty better places to find it. But this is on topic.

A Fox News clip that’s been aired frequently over the last few days shows the firing of some large artillery pieces, of the old-fashioned (meaning not self-propelled) variety. The camera briefly zooms in on the barrel, where (if you look sharp) you can see white writing: “$ SHOT”.

Money Shot. Noun: In pornography, the moment when the male performer pulls out so that his ejaculation may be captured on film. Allegedly so called because of a perceived need to convince the buying public that the sex was “real”.

So it would appear that we aren’t just killing Iraqis — we are subjecting them to a gigantic involuntary bukkake with long range flying globs of supersonic red hot metallic high explosive fragmenting semen.

Yippee.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Some people just like to get messy:

…if she were inclined to straight talk:

Now that I’ve introduced myself, you should buy me a mind bending beverage so that I can see that you aren’t cheap and that you find me attractive. I will need this mind bending beverage to flirt with you outrageously, thereby procuring your number or vice versa, and to keep you interested for the rest of the night so that you actually want to call it. I’d love to have sex with you as well, but since you are relationship material, I have to make you work for it and buy me a few dinners first. I might allow you to hug me or do something equally chaste such as kissing my cheek at the end of the night, but don’t count on anything overtly sexual for the next 2 dates. If this is not enough encouragement for you, you are simply a pig, a pervert, an asshole, or a man. My friends tell me I can do better.

From The Life of Erin.

Yup. It’s that time again. Here’s an animated .gif of a happy smurf getting a blowjob from Smurfette:

Halley says she has a new job! And she has pictures to prove it….

Bacchus constantly marvels at the things tourists will do, all unthinking. Does this lady look like she has so much as a shred of apprehension that her companion and photographer might choose this moment to renegotiate the ground rules of their relationship?