The geeks among you will be pleased to learn that penises have more bandwidth than cable modems.

Believe it or not, this link is courtesy of Instapundit.

Anil Dash is ranting about the diamond industry, and it’s an epic rant:

“Want your materialistic, easily-misled wife to stop being such a frigid bitch? Buy her a diamond! Did your husband decide to increase your consumer debt in order to buy you a pair of earrings that were mined at gunpoint by children in Africa? Reward him with grudging sex and a temporary cessation of your relentless nagging!”

It’s entertaining, and the man has a good point.

The Reverse Cowgirl is back with actual words on her blog (Yay!) and she links to a story from a college newspaper that’s sort of an overview of the bukkake thing, with a review of a specific American Bukkake title.

All of which is reproduced here because, as noted previously, bukkake is one of those fringe porn things that doesn’t get written about much with any degree of honesty. There are a bunch of wierd, odd, unusual, or downright gross things happening out on the fringes of porn, and folks with the courage to discuss them (perhaps thereby making them more comprehensible to the rest of us) should be encouraged.

However, all that is by way of disclaimer, because the article itself is exactly the sort of sex writing that ErosBlog usually avoids like the plague. When nominally pro-sex authors take great pains to mention and then reinforce that they are not aroused by the subject at hand, and then digress several times into discourses on the feminist implications of their topic, all while maintaining an intellectualized tone intended to remind everyone that they are, ya know, serious… well, the result tends not to be very interesting to anyone who is more interested in sexual topics than in academic pretension.

Having said all that, however, this particular article also contains the history of bukkake according to a director thereof, presented with all due skepticism:

Director [of the American Bukkake series] Jim Powers says, “Bukkake is about discipline.” He also provides background on the practice’s mock Asiatic name. “Bukkake is an ancient Japanese custom where if a woman cheated on her husband, the rest of the village men would take her off to a cave somewhere and jack off on her face and in her mouth. And usually what would happen is the woman would kill herself afterwards,” Powers says with an earnest expression and voice that make you eventually realize he actually believes what he’s saying.

According to legal blog “How Appealing” a convicted but unsuccessful semen smuggler will not be getting the (now seized) sperm back. The United States Court of Appeals for the Third Circuit held, in all its awesome appellate majesty and with just a hint of risque humor:

The District Court found that the criminal conduct to which Mrs. Parlavecchio pleaded guilty was conspiracy to bribe a public official, that is, “the illegal payment of money in exchange for receiving seminal fluids from Mrs. Parlavecchio’s husband.” In essence, Mrs. Parlavecchio was seeking a return of the very fruits of her criminal activity. The District Court held, therefore, that a return of the seminal fluid would violate the basic principle that a claimant in a civil equitable proceeding must come into court with “clean hands.”

Village Voice columnist Tristan Taormino reviews three female sex creams with results ranging from disappointing to, shall we say, painfully mixed:

O Clitoral Stimulating Gel also contains menthol, and the box reads, “You should feel an intense warmth for about 20 seconds.” I put a tiny dab of the clear gel on my clit, and the immediate feeling was more like a burn. Imagine holding your clit over an open flame, and you’re there with me, regretting my experimental nature for those 20 seconds. My instinct was to jump in the shower, but in the brochure it specifically said not to wash it off in the 20-second period, and that doing so may in fact increase the discomfort, which didn’t seem possible. So I sat tight, and when the burn faded, a wave of warmth and arousal came over me. Blood started rushing to my cunt, and I got really turned on. Maybe there was something to this Ben Gay on the puss after all. I started jerking off, but decided to wait till a certain someone came over to, um, assist. I ended up bringing myself to the edge of orgasm, then backing off, then getting there again. By the time I was in the thick of two-person sex, I was so overstimulated that I couldn’t come! I don’t hold O responsible: It definitely worked some major mojo on me and deserves a second chance.

What in the name of Aphrodite’s Strawberry-Flavored Nipple Rouge is going on in this picture? (Apart from the obvious, that is; the shagging is evident but how exactly is this event scored?)

One must hesitate before criticizing the laws, mores, and customs of other cultures.

…

OK, that was the requisite hesitation. Now we can get on with laughing at the authorities in Uganda, who are after the lovely lady shown here for the crime of, well, not wearing panties to the New Year celebration where that picture was taken. According to Uganda’s leading daily:

“We are considering charging her for indecent exposure. I will not let this lie. This was not sexual exploitation of an under-age girl,” an angry Inspector General of Police, Maj. Gen. Edward Katumba Wamala, said yesterday.

“From the picture, the girl is mature. This is a case of indecent exposure,” the Police chief said.

In an interview yesterday, Katumba Wamala vowed, “We shall take her on.”

You go, Inspector General Katumba Wamala. In civilized societies, this lady would get a prize, or at least a polite wave and a smile, for performing a little public beautification.