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December 1st, 2016 -- by Bacchus

Running Away

I’ll confess, it’s not one hundred percent clear to me why this man with no pants appears frightened and is running away from the nice nurse and her two friendly friends:

nightmare-clinic-detail

Thanks to Pulp Librarian for the artwork.

 
November 30th, 2016 -- by Bacchus

Winning The Sexfight

Here’s a special little tale of conflict that might have inspired the concept of the winner-fucks-loser girl-wrestling website Ultimate Surrender:

Janet pulled the box closer and opened the lid. When she looked inside, she couldn’t believe her eyes. In the box were two large strap on dildos and a couple of sets of handcuffs.

“What’s this for?” Janet asked, while shooting a hard look at her rival.

“I’m challenging you to a duel”, Susan replied. “I love Steve and I’m willing to fight for him. I dare you to meet me in a sexfight with Steve as the prize. I propose that we meet in the nude with these strap on dildos and our hands cuffed behind our backs. The winner gets Steve and the loser goes away and doesn’t come back.

Janet studied the blonde for several minutes and then said, “I accept, name your time and place.”

… Janet’s heart beat like a war drum in her ears. She was stark naked, with both hands cuffed behind her back and locked in the same room as her worst enemy. There was no where to run and no where to hide. The long tool between her legs was her only hope, her only weapon against a women bent on destroying her.

The two rivals stared at each other in stony silence. The only sound in the room was the faint buzzing of the light fixture. As if by some secret signal that only they could understand, the two women started walking toward each other. Stopping just a couple of feet apart, they began to circle. The dildos strapped to their waists, bobbed gently up and down, their glistening tips only inches apart.

“I’m going to make you sorry you ever messed with me”, Susan whispered as they circled. “I’m going to fuck you raw. You won’t be able to take any man inside you after I’m done.”

“Oh yeah”, Janet replied. “You’re dreaming bitch. I’m going to shove this dong into places you don’t even know you have yet.”

“Come on and just try it”, Susan snarled.

With a low growl, the two women slammed into each other, breast to breast. Beneath them, the dildos came together with a plastic clatter and dug into their stomachs as they pressed against each other. The sexfight was ON!

Taking a small step back, Susan spread her legs wide in invitation.

“Come here and fight me you little bitch”, she snarled.

Janet spread her legs and bent her knees, moving up until their pussies were only inches apart, the plastic dildos swaying above.

“You want some of me come and get it”, Janet replied.

Bending low, Susan leaned back and thrust up at her rival. Janet twisted to the left and Susan’s dildo slid over the top of her bare left thigh. Janet stooped lower and thrust back, missing her bushy blonde target and leaving a trail of gel on Susan’s stomach.

Standing nearly on top of each other, the two young women continued to rock their hips, trading thrust for thrust. Each tried to kneel lower that the other so that she could shove her dildo up and into her rival’s unprotected cunt. The hard plastic dongs beat against each other as they twisted and fought, thrusting their hips wildly.

They battled on for several minutes, missing over and over as the dildos darted back and forth, bouncing and sliding, then suddenly it happened. Janet had just missed with a thrust, the dong passing between Susan’s thighs and over but not into her vagina. As Janet started to pull back for yet another try, Susan rocked forward and thrust upward, the tapered point of her dildo slipping easily into Janet’s exposed sex. Janet gasped in shock as Susan, smiling now, pushed the big thick dong about half way into her. Janet straightened up and stumbled backwards. Susan tried to follow, but was just a little too slow, allowing Janet to slide off the dildo and escape.

The sex fight goes on inconclusively like this for quite some little time, before the ladies decide to get serious about it…

From The Challenge by Hal.

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November 29th, 2016 -- by Bacchus

Where’s Bert?

There’s a challenge associated with this photo:

where-is-bert

Of course that’s Rod Stewart, from the 1980 book Rock Stars In Their Underpants.

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November 28th, 2016 -- by Bacchus

Flossing Her Sinuses…With A Condom

condom up her nose and out her mouth

This cute-but-silly party trick comes with one strong reason not to try it: accidental condom inhalation is a thing. A thing you do not want.

(The picture you see is a .gif animation that’s fairly data-heavy, so you may have to wait a bit before the picture starts moving.)

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November 25th, 2016 -- by Bacchus

Black Friday Sex Toy Shopping Tip

Right now there are ten thousand sex toy bloggers lighting up their blogs and your social media feeds with Black Friday sales, special offers, and coupon codes for individual sex toy deals. I can’t compete with that cacophony, and what’s more I don’t want to compete with it. Instead, I want to offer you a “smart shopper” tip that I’m not seeing elsewhere.

My favorite sex toy outlets have Black Friday through Cyber Monday sales every year, with a long list of nicely-discounted items. So far, so ho-hum — although there are always a couple of very tempting items. This year it’s an adjustable metal spreader bar in non-threatening pink (LOL) and some stylin’ screw-type nipple clamps. But no: what makes these sales actually special is when they include something like a fifteen percent discount-code-at-checkout, which applies to non-sale items as well as to sale items.

The sex toy shopping tip I promised hangs on that otherwise-rare discount code. My advice is to shop the code, not the sales. Ignore the sale items and go shopping for the expensive sex toys that never get discounted anywhere. I would start with top-drawer name-brand designer vibrators and the metal and art glass dildos and plugs. (Where else will you save almost 45 bucks off the price of an Njoy Eleven?) Consider the large silicone toys, also; they rarely get much discount love, because the silicone in them costs so much. And finally, of course, if you were ever dreaming of dungeon furniture, expensive e-stim gear, or a fucking machine, these discount codes are your new best friend.

Shop the discount. Use it wisely, on expensive items that don’t usually see discounts. That’s my Black Friday sex toy shopping tip for you. Enjoy!

 
November 24th, 2016 -- by Bacchus

A Cthuloid Thanksgiving

In a mythos adjacent to our own and probably no more unlikely, the Pilgrims encountered the Old Ones before (and thus perforce instead of) meeting up with the local peoples:

thanksgiving-with-cthulhu

Art is Thanksgiving by Bog.

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November 23rd, 2016 -- by Bacchus

He Looked Better On Tinder

From Spanking Blog, here’s a vision of what it looks like when your internet dating isn’t going so well:

sunglasses riding crop and hard dick

The funny thing is, if history is my guide, I’ll get at least one intrepid person posting in the comments to the effect of “Riding crop and a hard dick? I can work with that, I’ve dated worse, hell, at this point I think I’d give the guy a tryout!”

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