February 6th, 2009 -- by Bacchus
The Sex Blog Of Record
February 5th, 2009 -- by Bacchus
Reversing The Shopping List
More comedy from Craigslist: If men wrote m4w ads like women wrote w4m ads.
It’s brutal but (to me) funny. You do see a lot of women who write personal ads like they were making a shopping list; and that’s probably sensible for the ones who are used to (and tired of) sorting through dozens or hundreds of wildly unsuitable online propositions. Still:
Isn’t it funny how most w4m ads are like checklists of requirements. These women think finding a guy is like ordering a sandwich – a little more height please, easy on the love of sports, and can you throw in a weekend house in the mountains and a willingness to support some other guy’s children?
If men wrote their m4w ads the same way, we would expect to see something like this:
Looking to meet the woman of my dreams. Someone who appreciates me for who I am. I love big TV’s, big trucks, baseball caps, and wife-beater tanks. I love going out with my friends to get drunk at strip clubs too. I’m looking for a nice woman who is not looking to jump into a relationship too soon but who knows what it means to be sexy and take care of her partner. Please no BBW’s (sorry) but you won’t look good on my arm when I wear a white t-shirt.
You must love dogs and my beer can collection, my dogs, my cans, and I are a package, so if you’re not into them then please move on. I like to let all 6 of my dogs sleep in my bed with me, so hopefully you don’t have a problem with that.
Deal breakers:
likes to shop too much
obsessed with height (i am short)
fat
talks about yourself too much
neediness
always wanting to talk about the relationship
small breasts (sorry, there is nothing sexier than grabbing onto a nice pair)
doesnt like to cook for her man
bossiness
nagging
always wanting to get up early in the morning
fat
intolerance of me and my habits
pressure to have kidsTurn ons:
thin
large breasts (very sexy)
quiet
beer drinker
has her own friends and won’t try to make me watch chick flicks
smells good
likes football
doesn’t expect me to pay all the time
intelligent but not too intelligent (i dont like nerdy girls)
rich father
thin
doesn’t have a relationship calendar, i.e. doesnt wonder after 3 months if we are going in the right direction.
Link via Sexoteric.
February 4th, 2009 -- by Bacchus
No More NakedJen On Facebook
Facebook obliterated Nakedjen.
Obliterated. Deleted. Made me disappear.
And they did it without any warning or even a simple email telling me that I had done something wrong.
My email to them asking what I might have done to cause such a brutal outcome was just met with an automatic reply telling me that I must be in violation of the TOS and to read it carefully.
Which I did. Every single word. Carefully. There is absolutely no term or stipulation that I even came close to violating other than that my name is Nakedjen. However, as I mentioned, that is MY name. And it has been my name on Facebook since day one. The email that I used for the service is even nakedjen@nakedjen.com Could I be more clear or obvious? I don’t think so.
What I also learned, while reading each and every word carefully, is that my account on Facebook is at will and can be terminated by Facebook at any time for any reason they deem “reasonable.” Basically, our accounts are being hosted for free on their servers. So this actually does make sense. If someone in their offices wakes up today and decides that the word Naked is pornographic or even just decides that my photo of Buddha wearing a ski cap is offensive, that person can just hit the delete button and bye bye Nakedjen.
It looks like they thought she was selling something. Doesn’t matter. Their mistake; she’s still deleted.
The longer I spend on the net, the more of this stuff I see. It’s why I don’t use Flickr, or LiveJournal, or any of the social networking sites. Build a sandcastle in somebody else’s sandbox, they will eventually kick it over.
Do what it takes to control your own data.
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February 1st, 2009 -- by Bacchus
Kinky Love Poem Contest
Today when I wandered over to the Stockroom website I found a poetry contest with a prize worth more than professional poets tend to make upon publication these days. The booty is a special edition pink version of their Bolero Straightjacket:
Apparently if pink doesn’t work for you as a prize, they’ll substitute a black one, or even (you fussy winner, you!) their more standard-cut Premium Leather Straightjacket. (The black Bolero has been previously featured on ErosBlog; and now they have a red version as well.)
So fire up your poetical engines and start cranking out some (un)suitable verse! “There once was a man from Nantucket…”
Er, on second thought, I’m pretty sure a limerick is not going to win this one.
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January 31st, 2009 -- by Bacchus
They Found The Ent-Wives!
Image credit: badly needed. (The lack of image credit on this one bothers me more than usual, because it looks like the work of a contemporary art photographer, but I found it on one of those Russian sites full of stolen/uncredited “funny” images. If anybody knows a good attribution, I’ll be happy to hear it.)
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January 30th, 2009 -- by Bacchus
Nipple Nibble
I don’t quite understand why we don’t see more of this sort of thing in bondage porn. There’s many a man out there who never misses an opportunity to grab, pinch, or nibble on an exposed nipple; and what’s bondage good for, if not for preventing those little automatic protective slappy motions that women make as unconsciously (and as necessarily, I’m sure) as they breathe?
Picture is from this shoot at Public Disgrace.
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