ErosBlog

The Sex Blog Of Record
 
 
September 14th, 2007 -- by Aphrodite

Have Gun, Will Treat It Like A Penis?

Aphrodite blogs:

I guess J and I are moving into couplehood now, he’s been having me watch his favorite old shows that he watched with his dad. I don’t know how many episodes of this show I’ve seen and this opening always gets me.

Guns scare me so I don’t know alot about them, but I thought it was bad form to treat a gun like a phallic symbol. Is it bad for me to admit that everytime I see this I wonder if he’s trying to aim with his “single eye” down there?

Similar Sex Blogging:

 
September 14th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Breast Physics

Here’s some serious scholarship on the state of T&A in today’s videogames. My favorite passage:

Nowadays, you almost wouldn’t bother to ship a game without some kind of T&A angle; serious people use the phrase “breast physicsâ€? without irony. Female leads are common–and if they tend heavily, if not exclusively, toward an adolescent bondage-fantasy aesthetic, well… is “fetish pinup ninjaâ€? not an improvement on “kidnapped girlfriend?â€?

Do I really have to choose? Why can’t I have both?

 
September 12th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

The Why Of Butt Sex

Always Aroused Girl got asked, essentially, “why in the hell…?” More specifically, “why would a woman need anal sex, when she’s got a vagina, the ideal self-lubrified device that mother nature specially crafted for the purpose?”

She responded, in part:

Sometimes we do things not because we need to, but because we want to. Because we really REALLY want to. Because for months or even years, we’ve wanted to. Because something deep inside our tiny reptilian brains screams out in a voice that cannot be ignored, “Penetrate my bottom!”

And if you are wise, if you love your ass (and why wouldn’t you love your ass?) you will listen to that part of your brain, because (and this is the secret) ass sex feels really great to some people. It feels really great to some men and some women. It feels really great to some straight folks and some not-straight folks.

It doesn’t feel better than vaginal sex, nor does it feel worst than vaginal sex. It just feels different. It feels different in the same way that oral sex feels different than vaginal sex. It feels different in the same way that blue looks different from red. It feels different in the same way that lasagna tastes different from steak.

None of those things are intrinsically better or worse. They are just different.

If you are among those folks for whom anal sex feels really great, you’ll know what I mean, Annie. You’ll know exactly why it’s worth the effort to prepare your ass (and your mind) for anal sex. You’ll know exactly why you devote the time to working with your partner toward anal sex.

You do it because buttsex feels really great, and it feels really great to share that really great feeling with your partner.

And the only way you’ll know if you are one of the folks who loves anal sex is if you try anal sex.

But Annie, please don’t have anal sex until you know you want to try. When you are ready to try, a small voice in your head will start begging. You’ll be enjoying your traditional sexual activities when suddenly you’ll hear, “Play with me, please!”

And you’ll discover that it’s your ass begging for attention. If that happens, consider exploring buttsex.

Similar Sex Blogging:

 
September 10th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Explicit Erotic Wallpapers For Your iPhone

I don’t have an iPhone — I’m not a huge fan of expensive devices locked to a single carrier with notoriously awful customer service — but I admit that they do look awfully nifty. And, ever since Boing Boing put out the call for erotic wallpaper, I’ve been mindful that the specs for iPhone wallpaper (320px by 480px at 160dpi, according to Boing Boing) aren’t too different from the image sizes that usually appear here on ErosBlog.

Accordingly, when I stumbled across two extremely explicit sex drawings by Swedish artist Anders Zorn, I thought it would be fun to share them here with iPhone wallpaper sizing ( according to Boing Boing):

blowjob wallpaper for iPhone

sex wallpaper for iPhone

Please do let me know if anyone finds this useful. It would be simple to post more stuff in this size if people enjoy that feature.

Similar Sex Blogging:

 
September 9th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

How To Polish Boots

In which Slave Barb seduces someone who’s not into “that kinky submission stuff” into letting her polish his boots:

“You are not going to the show wearing those boots are you?”
I teased.

“Why not? What’s wrong with them?” he looked down, turning his foot from side to side.
“They’re filthy and they look like hell. You should let me clean them up for you.”

He stared hard at me. “Look, I know you’re in to all that kinky submission stuff, but I am not. And I am not interested.”
“I offered to clean and shine your boots for you, I didn’t offer to be your slave or for you to spank me. Piss off!”

“Hey, I’m sorry. It’s just that I don’t understand all the stuff you’ve been getting in to. It’s…weird.”

“Weird? Have you ever seen me as happy and well adjusted as I have been in the past year? No? Well then, I guess I’m just weird.”
“Do my boots really look shitty?” Ahhh, appealing to his fashion sense is the way to his heart.

“Yes, you look like a perfectly disheveled crack addict, not the dashing punk you’re trying to look like.” I smirked at him. “Let me get myboot kit and work on them real quick. You like how shiny MY boots look, right?”
He glanced down at my feet. “You can make mine look like yours?”

“Well, yours won’t grow a high heel, but yes, I can make them look shiny and pretty.”
“Ok. But no kinky stuff”

“Oh, shut up and sit down and pour yourself some wine”
I hustled over to the cabinet and got out my boot kit. Crap, why did I push him so hard? I mean,

yeah, I’ve had a crush on him forever — he’s had a crush on me forever too, but… I swung by the kitchen to fill up a little bowl of water to go with the saddle soap.
He was sitting on the couch and was fidgeting with the cork screw.

I hiked up me skirt as I knelt down on the rug at his feet.
“What are you doing?” He asked, dropping the cork screw and backing up as far as the back of the couch would allow.

“I’m pulling up my skirt so it doesn’t get dirty — would you prefer that I take it off?” I asked wickedly, with a grin.
“N-n-no.” he replied.

“Good. Because I wasn’t intending on doing this nude.” He smiled back.
I picked up his boot. Well, I tried to pick it up. “Look, relax — I’m going to black your boots, not cut your foot off.”

“Sorry.” He let me pick up his boot this time.
I pulled his foot towards me and settled it on my thigh as I knelt. “Hmmm….”

“Hmm, What?”

“I was thinking ‘hmmm… what a mess’….”
“Oh.”

“Yeah. Oh.”
I picked up the lighter.

“What’s that for?” He started pulling away.
“Oh, for Pete’s sake! Sit still, drink your Shiraz and be quiet. Obviously you’re not interested in what I’m doing or your boots wouldn’t look like this.”

I looked over his boots and ah-ha! A loose thread. I lit that Zippo and melted it off.
“Oh!” He exclaimed.

“Yeah. Oh.” He grinned down sheepishly.
I checked out his other boot and burned off another 2 threads.

Back to the first boot… I opened my tin of saddle soap. “Want to smell?, I asked as I lifted the tin to his face.
“Mmmm, nice. Much nicer that I thought it would be.”

I picked up my little brush, dipped it in that little bowl of water and lathered up the saddle soap.
I spread it over his right boot, working it into all the crevices around the sole, the harness and up the shaft. I put down the brush and started rubbing the lather in with my moist hands. I looked up surreptitiously thru my bangs to see the expression on his face. Bingo! A lovely cross between ecstasy and bewilderment. What have we here? I laughed to myself — a Boot Top in the making?

There’s a lot more, complete with flaming boot polish.

 
September 8th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Whip In One Hand, Penis In The Other

This could only come from Spanking Blog: a vintage sex picture featuring two naked people and a whip, where everybody’s having fun:

vintage whip sex photo

 
September 6th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Motor Scooter With Benefits

I’m not sure it’s possible to be pimpin’ on a motor scooter. But if it’s possible, this guy’s on the trail of how to do it:

blowjob scooter

Looks like he’s enjoying the ride, too.

 
 
cupid