So, there was this girlfriend once. I took her tent camping to a spectacular place in a fairly cool climate, and I made sure we had two new sleeping bags that zipped together into one big one. My first hint that the relationship was in trouble was when she refused to let me zip them together. It was all downhill from there.

Somehow, I don’t think it’s going to be cool (metaphorically or otherwise) in this tent tonight:

Picture is from Usenet.

Similar Sex Blogging:

• Zipped-Together Sleeping Bags, Demonstrated
• She Balked At The Zipping
• A Grand Day Out
• Teenagers and Sex on the Beach
• Have That One Bathed And Sent To My Tent

It amazes me how people can put slogans on pictures and end up with the weirdest combinations. But they post them on the web and think it’s all good! I got a big laugh when I saw this picture, which I cropped before posting here:

I wonder what items she keeps in there….

A long time ago I ranted against the blog tradition of labeling adult links as “not safe for work”:

I hate the way people refer to ErosBlog as not work safe. It’s a pet peeve. See, the deal is, ErosBlog is safe for work, although perhaps not conducive to getting any done. If it’s not safe for you to view ErosBlog where you work, it’s your work that’s not safe for ErosBlog. Just because some of my readers live in the United States and choose to work in environments where they are treated like horny fifth-graders and assumed to be unable to make responsible choices about viewing and displaying sexual material, there’s no reason to call the blog unsafe, especially when other readers and potential readers live or work in less repressive societies (or environments, such as their own office or home) where the blog is perfectly safe. Folks, if your work isn’t safe for ErosBlog, consider getting some different work! And if you can’t do that (and I know a lot of folks feel stuck in their lives) at least don’t assume that everyone else in the world is in the same boat.

Fast forward to today, when security expert Bruce Schneier posted a blog entry about the novelty nude Euro bills being passed as real money:

The very first comment in response to his post was a stiff complaint about the link he posted:

Bruce, next time, it would be an idea to indicate the link might not be safe for work. Some of us might have some explaining to do if looking at those images.

I really liked Bruce’s incredulous response:

You have got to be kidding. Where in the world do you work?

The sentiments from my long-ago rant were echoed by a different commenter:

I think if you could get into trouble by just reading the article linked by Bruce, then you really have a harsh working environment. What about a change of work?

Sadly, several other folks chimed in to support the complainer. It’s not just one person who wants their links pre-vetted to include warnings against newsworthy boobie artwork, it’s lots of people. The job culture, I swear it’s a menace.

A fine old publicity still featuring Barbara Eden:

You gotta admit it, she really knows how to assume the position!

I’ve commented before (most notably in the comments to this post about the production of spanking porn) that I don’t have much time for so-called feminists who can’t respect a woman’s sexual decisions. When feminists stop standing up for the choices women make, I stop recognizing them as feminists, it’s that simple.

Thus there’s some interest to be found in this Spanking and Feminism thread over at Spanking Blog. The post itself chides kinky men who won’t take ownership of their kinkiness, who can’t admit they want to spank and dominate for the fun of it, so they instead pretend (to themselves and to the world) that the women they are spanking are weak inferior creatures who would be lost without the “guidance and discipline” these ever-so-benevolent dudes are offering.

As discussion simmered in the comments, ranging wider and wider as discussions of BDSM and feminism tend to do, along came someone claiming to “respect individual choices” while simultaneously arguing that “it’s really hard to seperate out cultural expectations and personal choices.” Which, translated, means something like “You say you chose to do that, but I don’t believe you, and thus I’m free to condemn your choice.” I enjoyed the response:

No, it’s really not hard to separate out personal choices from cultural expectations. When someone says “This is my choice” you respect that, absolutely, or you just became part of the problem. If you retain niggling reservations, if you’re willing to question the individual’s self report of her choice, then you are failing to respect her personal choice and you are claiming, in effect, that you know better than the individual. Viewed charitably, the claim is still a version of “Your society has made it impossible for you to act as as a self-actualized individual adult human; you’re so messed up that you can’t even correctly determine or report what you want.” That’s an infantilizing, disempowering, patronizing claim and although it’s often made by folks who claim the badge of feminism, it’s no part of a true feminism that I could respect.

Just so.

Sometimes I have to link to an article (like this one on playing with anal toys) as much for the post title as for the content. How can you not read an article entitled A Spy In The House Of Ass?

My girl’s eyes grow wide as I remove the fatter butt plug from its packaging and brandish it before her. “You wanna put that in me?”

“C’mon, it’s not that big. I had mine in for like half an hour.”

She relents. I watch, fascinated, as her little asshole expands to accommodate the plug at its widest cross-section and then collapses around the narrow neck above the base, locking the toy into position. Leslie sighs. I pull her to the edge of the mattress, push her legs against her chest and plunge into her cunt. “Now you have both holes filled, you little slut!”

And when she comes the butt plug shoots out of her, bouncing off the wooden floor like a rubber ball. We both giggle. I switch holes — if the butt plug won’t keep her rear-end occupied I will — and it’s not long before I burst inside her, my knees threatening to buckle.

After the body buffet of foreplay is over and it’s down to making the beast with two backs, what’s more delicious than the telltale swelling of his cock right before he comes? For me nothing’s better than that tease.

And even though I enjoyed that just a little bit ago, I’m getting all warm and tingly again just thinking about it.