March 30th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
Via BoingBoing comes word of James Lilek’s latest snarky deconstruction of mid-20th-century fashion, this time in the form of the amazingly-tame 1977 catalog from Fredericks Of Hollywood:
“On the far left, a small bra ad: it’s Farrah Fawcett, practicing her expressions should she land a role that requires her to be slapped, yet look sexy and available.”
Sometimes the Lileks caption is all you need:
“Lord Slink from the Planet Mantis puts the move on Loni Anderson.”
March 30th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
Here’s a hilarious transcript of cybersex gone terribly … right? Some goon tries to pretend to be a master, but he seems to think it mostly involves virtual punches and namecalling. And then the hunter becomes the hunted:
mia: *gets out strap-on, and slips it on*
jblack: whoa
mia: *attaches 14″ dildo to strap-on*
mia: *lubes the dildo up*
jblack: where’s the girl? you’re going to fuck a girl right?
mia: you’re the girl. i’m going to fuck you.
jblack: master does not approve
mia: no, see. this whole time you’re under the assumption that i needed to be dominated
mia: the truth of the matter is, I do the dominating.
mia: and to prove it
mia: i’m going to fuck your cyber ass until it cyber bleeds
jblack: master says no
mia: no, YOUR MASTER says yes
mia: bend the fuck over
jblack: i don’t like this
mia: too fucking bad, worm. you’re gonna get it now
mia: *bends you over. spreads your ass.*
jblack: no i don’t want this
mia: he doesn’t WANT this, he says. what about what i said, before you cyber raped me, DICK?
mia: all i’m doing is what you did to me. you think that’s unfair?
jblack: yes
mia: and why is that
jblack: because i aint a fag
mia: oh but i am?
jblack: different. your a bitch
mia: no, actually, YOU’RE the bitch right now
mia: *slams my big dildo into your ass*
mia: oh that feels so good doesn’t it, bitch?
jblack: this is rape
mia: “shut up, bitch. enjoy it”
mia: oh yeah, you like that?
mia: you like Master’s cock?
*jblack has signed off*
Similar Sex Blogging:
March 28th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
When I was just a kid, I remember seeing some brightly colored surreal erotic landscapes in a Penthouse magazine, featuring breast mountains, penis volcanoes, semen rivers, and the like. The latest erotic drawing by Patty at Creative Spanked Wife put me fondly in mind of that long-forgotten pictorial, but I like this better:
What you see here is a severely cropped-and-reduced thumbnail of Patty’s drawing, so be sure to go see the whole thing at full size.
March 27th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
Oddest sex spam of the day, reproduced in its entirety:
Hi
Buy viagra or die!
Have a nice day.
Although I’m not sure it’s technically spam, since it came through without a working link or a valid reply email. Perhaps it’s just an aggressive new brand awareness campaign by Pfizer?
March 26th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
In which the heroine of Pillowbook utterly demolishes the serenity of a stuffy “naturist” camp with straight talk, direct action, and showering without a towel. An example of the straight talk:
The second thing I realised was that I had that familiar wet feeling between my thighs.
Well, all right, no point being bashful: not between my thighs, exactly, but between my cunt lips, and slick down my perineum to my arse.
March 25th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
Here are a couple of photographs of a life-sized statue of Britney Spears giving birth. Questionable taste? Who cares, it’s Britney Spears naked!
Of course all art is political and this statue is assuredly no exception. For the backstory and the blah blah blah and the link credits and the source website with the popups, go see the story on Boing Boing.
See also: Britney Spears Pregnant: The Rear View
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March 24th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
Steph broke out the manifesto pen the other day, and I like the results:
I have sex as often as I’m able, within the constraints of my own sense of morality. I’ve given blow jobs. I’ve taken it backwards and forwards. I’ve used birth control of more than one variety. I’ve had sex in public places. I own sex toys. I’ve watched porn. I’ve tried to become better and better at sex every time I have it. I own bondage gear.
And I am not yet on a first-name basis with Satan. Shocking, I know, but true. I, in fact, (gasp) have gone to church in the last six months. I donate to charity. I do not have a criminal record. I do housework. I pay my taxes — honestly. I don’t lie on my resume. I call my parents regularly. I’m always punctual. I’m a model employee. I treat people with respect. I ride a cute scooter and obey the laws of the road.
Nonetheless, right now, I’d like to get fucked silly and sideways, and if that makes me amoral, then sign me up, baby.
