I admit that it seems rather churlish, but if I had paid the large sum of cash it would take to get Tori Stone and her “sister” Tawnee Stone to come to my house and wash my car, I think I’d be going “Ladies, ladies, you look real nice and all, but how about sponging some of those suds onto my actual vehicle?”

“Girls, you missed a spot….”

A rare political excursion for ErosBlog:

Quietly and unanimously, the Senate passed the Real ID Act last week. It’s been signed into law. Within a few years you will have a national ID card. Or you’ll be an extremely marginal member of society.

Or (and this is not exclusive with option two above) you can join the Real ID Rebellion.

Whatever your politics, remember this: sexual nonconformists always suffer in a police state.

My delete finger is gonna be twitchy in the comments on this thread. I posted the link to help people as angry as I am find like-minded folks who are looking for ways to fight. If you think this is no big deal, please express that opinion elsewhere. Save the debate for your blog. And don’t bother with partisan comments — because no Senator from either party voted against this monstrosity. I’ll ruthlessly delete any comments that try to promote or specially accuse either faction of these power-mad bastards.

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• THIS Is The Culture War?

You’ve probably seen the famous Wally Wood “Disneyland Memorial Orgy” picture before, but the LA Weekly is showing a fairly-high-quality version of it on the web just now. But what caught my eye was the straightforward description of the image. It reads something like an obscenity indictment and something like the the poem an acid-head might write:

Pluto is pissing on a portrait of Mickey Mouse, while the real, bedraggled Mickey is shooting up heroin. His nephews are jerking off as they watch Goofy fucking Minnie Mouse on a combination bed and cash register. The beams shining out from Sleeping Beauty’s Castle are actually dollar signs. Dumbo is simultaneously flying and shitting on an infuriated Donald Duck. Huey, Dewey and Louie are peeking at Daisy Duck’s asshole as she watches the Seven Dwarfs groping Snow White. The prince is snatching a peek of Cinderella’s snatch while trying a glass slipper on her foot. The Three Little Pigs are humping each other in a daisy chain. Jiminy Cricket leers as Tinker Bell does a striptease and Pinocchio’s nose gets longer.

Thanks to Boing Boing for the link.

Throughout my adult life, I’ve noticed that a standard question for sex advice columnists is the “my partner won’t orally pleasure me, what should I do?” question. And for years and years, I’ve been seeing the same sets of tired suggestions for cajoling him/her into it, leavened with the occasional “learn to do without if you really love them” advice.

Leave it to Dan Savage to put all the cards on the table and acknowledge that the head train has left the station. It’s a new century, folks, and standards are higher. The old hangups just won’t fly. Sez Dan, in a pair of word-for-word identical responses:

About time somebody said it.

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Vintage bondage photos are everywhere, but these ladies just struck me as prettier than normal for the genre:

Pictures like this also make me wonder whether we didn’t lose something when we minimized the number and size and complexity of lady’s undergarments….

Daze says it best: “Fuck You George Lucas!”

You know that annoying javascript some people put on their web pages so that you can’t easily right-click on a photo or link, or select any of the text? I guess it buys protection from dim-witted content thieves who don’t know how to “view source”, but only at the expense of annoying anyone who wants to right click on a link to open it in a new window. And that’s not the only downside to this stupid code.

Three times this week I’ve tried to link to somebody’s sex blog, only to have that idiot javascript kick in when I went to select a key sentence for quoting. And each time, I reacted by clicking away. You don’t want me to copy a sentence from your blog? Fine, I won’t. No problem. No link, either.

The last one I found popped up an error message reading “This blog is FULLY protected!” when I tried to select a sentence. And it is fully protected, too. Protected, in this case, from being put on the ErosBlog sex blog list, and further protected from appearing in the Thursday edition of the Sex Blog Roundup on Fleshbot.