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No More Bear Meat In Glory Hole

Tuesday, August 6th, 2024 -- by Bacchus

Over the weekend, bears briefly became a part of the national conversation due to fringe presidential candidate RFK Jr. admitting he once left a dead bear in Central Park as a practical joke. (Yeah, that sentence is a lot. Take a second. Let it wash over you. Breathe in. Breathe out. OK, now we continue.)

The news was received on social media with the amount of levity you would expect. Which prompted someone to reminisce about a long-ago news story from the Associated Press with the headline “No More Bear Meat In Glory Hole”. A friend of mine spotted the reminiscence and knew I was the person to ask: was there ever really such a headline?

There was, my friends. There was:

news story about bear meat at the glory hole soup kitchen in Juneau Alaska

As disappointing as this headline must have been for the horny young twinks who hang around in that one special restroom stall at the municipal fairgrounds, long-time readers of this blog will see the “Juneau, Alaska” dateline on the AP store and realize we’ve already discussed the glory holes of Juneau at length. The bear meat headline that looked so funny was in fact a blow to local charitable efforts; the Glory Hole mentioned in the article is a soup kitchen and the bear meat formerly went into the soup.

Why is there a small-town soup kitchen called “The Glory Hole”? That’s literally a long story. Short version: “Glory hole” was a mining term for a certain kind of big hole in the ground long before it was a gay cruising thing, and drunken down-on-their-luck laborers in an isolated (no roads to Juneau) mining town were thus said to be “down the glory hole”. And so it was, in a nod to that tradition, that the Juneau Cooperative Christian Ministry opened a soup kitchen in 1981 and named it The Glory Hole. As I wrote before:

Did they know about gay sexual slang, these charitable Christian people, back in 1981, in that little town with no roads going in or out, before the internet, before the cruise ships started bringing five million visitors a year? Was it naïve to name a soup kitchen by local tradition in a town of less than 20,000 residents that was 1500 miles from San Francisco? Would they have cared if indeed they did know about the gay slang? Or would they have laughed it off as an irrelevant oddity of far-distant urbanites?

A lot of people have gotten a lot of laughs about that long-ago naming choice, sure. But a lot of hot meals got served at The Glory Hole, too.

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How To Fuck With Murder Hoboes

Saturday, October 1st, 2022 -- by Bacchus

Have you ever felt that if you, an NPC, had a chance to issue quest instructions to the adventurers passing through your sleepy little town, you’d be irresistibly tempted to send them spelunking for the Chalice Of Ligma? If so, you can sleep well, because somebody like you sent these innocent fools into this dungeon on a quest for the Hole Of Glory:

glory hole gloryhole gaming meme

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Glory Hole Fun

Wednesday, April 21st, 2021 -- by Bacchus

thisbe at her gloryhole

If we are to believe the Roman poet Ovid, the first glory hole was the one used by the illicit lovers Pyramus and Thisbe. Ovid wrote down their story more than two thousand years ago, but he was popularizing folklore that was ancient then. In Ovid’s discreet retelling, those two lusty young people merely used the hole between their houses to whisper through and make illicit assignations. But modern authors have elaborated this into an explicit dick-in-a-hole erotic tale. Human nature being what it is, my money bets that P&T wasted no time at all figuring out the best use of a convenient hole.

blond gloryhole girl eats a dick

Per the pallid phrasings of Wikipedia on the subject of glory holes, we learn of the first appearance of a glory hole in actual historical documents. These tell us all about the legal tribulations of the unfortunate Mr. Guillam, who in 1707 was minding his own eliminatory business when “a boy in the adjoyning vault put his privy-member through a hole” and offered it for a lewd proposition. Mr. Guillam fled in surprise, but the whole sordid exchange was witnessed by a blackguard who accosted Mr. Guillam and attempted, apparently without success, to blackmail him over it. As we learn over and over, there’s nothing sexual that was invented recently!

gloryhole balls licked

Although glory holes gained a lot of notoriety in the 20th century as a venue for gay cruising and casual sex, the fantasy potential of the Pyramus-and-Thisbe situation has never been lost on pornographers. Having all kinds of anonymous sex through a hole is a notion that appeals to plenty of men and women both.

busy gloryhole slut

Outside the gay pornosphere, surprisingly, we don’t see as much modern glory-hole porn as you might think. Even a hard-working review site that does in-depth pornsite reviews like this AdultTime review in all kinds of porn niches, doesn’t list very many sites in their gloryhole porn sites section. Into this underserved market, fortunately, the vast army of hentai artists have thrust themselves with vigor and panache! As indeed the artwork in this post demonstrates conclusively.

sucking two glory hole cocks

I imagine the appeal of the gloryhole lies in its anonymity and no-strings-attached simplicity. A dick protruding from a hole has only one demand, and that demand is simple. A willing mouth on the other side of the hole will be too busy to ask you for anything that might complexify the exchange. No fuss, a minimum of muss, and everybody goes away happy!

my porn advisor banner

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Conversation Through A Glory Hole

Friday, March 15th, 2019 -- by Bacchus

I don’t know a lot about gay cruising etiquette back in the day, but my sense is that it was pretty rough and ready. I don’t think it usually required a lot of talk or seduction in those notorious mens’ rooms. Nonetheless, I guess a few words sometimes passed through the glory holes before the dicks were introduced:

gay men having a conversation through a glory hole

Artwork is from an undated vintage gay porn magazine called Glory Hole: A Study Of Homosexual Activity In Public Places.

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Toilet Trysting: Vintage Glory Hole

Sunday, March 10th, 2019 -- by Bacchus

The notion of fucking through a small hole in a barrier wall probably dates back to ribald riffs on Ovid’s tale of Pyramus and Thisbe. The earliest depiction in erotic art that I’ve come across is this glory hole between toilets illustration by Paul Gavarni, the date for which is sometimes given as “circa 1840” and sometimes as “circa 1852”:

vintage glory hole in an old pit toilet

The artwork is often found cropped narrow and tall, as on this postcard-type board:

vintage glory hole with peeping tom voyeur

It was not easy finding a large and complete scan of the uncropped work.

Interestingly, the art is usually found with the incredibly pretentious title The Place Of Pleasure attached to it. But one source (a poor digital photo from Erotic Art – From the 17th to the 20th Century: The Dopp Collection) not only offers us a much earthier title, it also seems to show us a more sensitive treatment of the coloring, if that is not just a photographic artifact:

knothole version of vintage glory hole

According to that book/photo, the artwork is called Das Astloch (The Knothole). Does this make sense, when the gloryhole in question is an engineered contrivance of riveted metal plates? Perhaps not. But I like it better nonetheless.

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What’s In A Glory Hole?

Wednesday, March 11th, 2015 -- by Bacchus

glory hole at Treadwell, Alaska, on Douglas Island near Juneau

It’s right there in Wikipedia: A glory hole is “a surface depression produced by block caving in underground mining.” Which is to say: you dig a lot of ore out of an underground mine, and eventually the roof falls in. You get a glory hole, a big dangerous crumbling conical pit. If you fall into a glory hole, you don’t come out again.

glory hole behind town of treadwell alaska

Nobody seems to know just when this mining term originated, but it was in standard use (albeit inside scare quotes to indicate slang) by the time The Colliery Engineer wrote about the Treadwell Mine near Juneau, Alaska, in 1904:

Treadwell Glory Hole 1904

(Click photo or here for article.)

In mining towns back in the day, a down-on-his-luck miner or a terrible public drunk (often the same individual) was said to be “down the glory hole.” A big hole you fall into and can’t ever hope to get out of again? It seems a reasonable analogy to alcoholism and despair.

Fast forward to sometime in the 1940s. Again nobody seems to know the details, but according to the Online Etymology Dictionary, a sexual connotation to the phrase “glory hole” arose in the gay community. You loyal ErosBlog readers know this meaning:

gay glory hole art

Press the fast forward button again. Now it’s 1981. The Juneau Cooperative Christian Ministry opens a soup kitchen and homeless shelter for local indigents and drunks. Their mission?

In response to God’s commandment to love our neighbors as ourselves, the mission of The Glory Hole is to provide food, shelter and compassion to achieve physical and spiritual well-being for those most in need.

That’s from their website. They’re good folks. There’s a vegetable garden on their roof. They rely on donations. (The PayPal button is on their page.) People of all faiths, or no faith at all, volunteer for them and support their fundraisers. All this info is on their website or in Google, not buried very deep.

Back in 1981, yes they did go there: they named their new soup kitchen “The Glory Hole.” It was a nod to local history and tradition, with the collapsed mines and the people who had metaphorically fallen in. Did they know about gay sexual slang, these charitable Christian people, back in 1981, in that little town with no roads going in or out, before the internet, before the cruise ships started bringing five million visitors a year? Would they have cared if they did know? Or would they have laughed it off as an irrelevant oddity of far-distant urbanites?

Fast forward again to 2015. There’s a re-dedication ceremony for the soup kitchen and shelter. Ostentatious ceremonial praying is involved, because that’s how religion is done. A photograph of the ceremony makes the front page of the local paper. (It’s still a small town where, apparently, not much happens.)

But this is the 21st century, full of net-savvy hipsters aware of all internet traditions as well as everything that’s on Urban Dictionary. If it clickbaits, it leads. Truth? Reportage? Journalism? 30 seconds of Googling? Nah, why bother! Scoffing is funner!

And that’s how you get a thing like this at a place like Boing Boing:

Notably naïve Christian group names Alaska men's shelter

Look at that smug headline again:

Notably naïve Christian group names Alaska men’s shelter “The Glory Hole”

Of course The Glory Hole in Juneau is not actually a men’s shelter, it’s open to people regardless of gender, which destroys the biggest part of the joke. (Xeni Jardin at Boing Boing grabbed that wrong detail, obviously without checking the charity’s website, from one of her credited sources, while grabbing the graphic from the other one.)

And about the naming of the place? It’s right there in the photo caption: the story is about the charity’s rededication, not its founding. The facility was set up and named back in 1981 (a fact that’s also on the website). So the newspaper story isn’t even about what the Boing Boing headline claims it’s about. Was it in fact “notably naïve” to name a soup kitchen after a strong local cultural tradition in 1981 in a town of less than 20,000 residents that was 1500 miles from San Francisco? I guess that’s a matter of opinion. But small town naiveté in 1981 wouldn’t be funny clickbait, would it? Nope, this will go viral a lot faster if you pretend the naïve act of naming happened in 2015. So let’s go with that, shall we? Hit the publish button! Viral viral viral!

Bloggers are generally not journalists. I don’t aspire to that standard, which is a good thing, because I can’t live up to it. Xeni Jardin, however, does claim to be a “tech culture journalist.” I guess “tech culture journalist” means never having to click through and check the website of the people you are making fun of. In order to find out if they are actually, you know, risible?

Update: Since publication of this post, BoingBoing has modified their item by adding this paragraph, including a direct link to the charity in question, to the bottom of Xeni’s post:

They do good work. They feed and provide shelter to the hungry and homeless. After you finish laughing, consider donating.

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Bunny Girl Happily Working A Glory Hole

Monday, November 10th, 2014 -- by Bacchus

Some things in the world you’re just not going to see in real life. This is probably one of them, and it’s a shame:

woman wearing bunny ears lovingly sucking an anonymous cock through a glory hole

Artwork is signed “Ondine”.

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Robot Glory Hole

Sunday, June 29th, 2014 -- by Bacchus

robot-gloryhole

The latest traveler’s tale out of China is of a medical device to facilitate easier sperm donation. It looks sort of like a kiosk with a mechanized Fleshlight in it:

A Chinese hospital in Nanjing, capital of Jiangsu Province, has introduced a new machine that makes sperm donation even easier- an automatic sperm extractor. The effortless machine features a massage pipe that can be adjusted to suit the height of the user. All the gentleman has to do is plug in the frequency, amplitude and temperature and off they go. It’s also fitted with a small screen for those feeling uninspired.

According to the director of the urology department of the hospital, the machine is designed to help individuals that are finding it difficult to retrieve sperm the old fashioned way.

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Peep Show

Wednesday, June 2nd, 2010 -- by Bacchus

Here’s another one of those bits of venerable art that I don’t fully understand. My first thought was that we were looking at some sort of field-expedient glory hole affair, but upon second perusal, it looks more like a peep show for the ladies:

peep show for the french ladies

All I know about this is that it’s by an artist called Henri Monnier.

 
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