4 Responses to “Elf Sex (Canonical Version)”

1. Karl Elvis said (on December 29th, 2005 at 2:26 am)

   I sorta thought it went more like this:

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   “Do you like what you doth see . . . ?” said the voluptuous elf-maiden as she provocatively parted the folds of her robe to reveal the rounded, shadowy glories within. Frito’s throat was dry, though his head reeled with desire and ale. She slipped off the flimsy garment and strode toward the fascinated boggie unashamed of her nakedness. She ran a perfect hand along his hairy toes, and he helplessly watched them curl with the fierce insistent wanting of her.

   “Let me make thee more comfortable,” she whispered hoarsely, fiddling with the clasps of his jerkin, loosening his sword belt with a laugh. “Touch me, oh touch me,” she crooned.

   Frito’s hand, as though of its own will, reached out and traced the delicate swelling of her elf-breast, while the other slowly crept around her tiny, flawless waist, crushing her to his barrel chest.

   “Toes, I love hairy toes,” she moaned, forcing him down on the silvered carpet. Her tiny, pink toes caressed the luxuriant fur of his instep while Frito’s nose sought out the warmth of her precious elf-navel.

   “But I’m so small and hairy, and . . . and you’re so beautiful,” Frito whimpered, slipping clumsily out of his crossed garters.

   The elf-maiden said nothing, but only sighed deep in her throat and held him more firmly to her faunlike body. “There is one thing you must do for me first,” she whispered into one tufted ear.

   “Anything,” sobbed Frito, growing frantic with his need. “Anything!”

   She closed her eyes and then opened them to the ceiling. “The Ring,” she said. “I must have your Ring.”

   Frito’s whole body tensed. “Oh no,” he cried, “not that! Anything but . . . that.”

   “I must have it,” she said both tenderly and fiercely. “I must have the Ring!”

   =========================

   I’m so terribly sorry. ;)

2. tim said (on December 29th, 2005 at 11:12 am)

   thanks to following this link and many others from there. And also my curiosity, I: 1) know what a rotoscope is. 2)have a better understanding of eugenics and 3) Have a beter understanding of the victorian mores that influenced tolkien. When you link J.R.R Tolkien and sex you wind up with something thats very… educational :crazy:

3. Tyellas said (on January 1st, 2006 at 7:05 am)

   I read this blog all the time – and I send your link to others when I want to introduce them to sex blogs (‘read this one!’). So I’m totally tickled to see you’ve linked to the “Elf Sex” piece. Please keep the naughty posts coming!

4. d said (on January 15th, 2006 at 7:05 am)

   Okay, okay, no one else has said it so I’ll have to: Elves like goblin cock.(picture of smiley face groaning at bad pun.)

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