September 14th, 2006 -- by Bacchus
Anal Sex: Reading The Signs
Ok, ok, sometimes we men are pigs. Certainly the old “Oops, I slipped it in the wrong hole” game never won us any style points, nor good anal either. But ladies, c’mon — isn’t this going a little too far in the other direction?
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An X of mine once ended up in bed with a chick who had a tattoo on her ass of Elmer Fudd saying,”Get out of that hole, you wascally wabbit!” while aiming a gun in the general vicinity of her bunghole.
Next to that, a Crayola stop sign is positively subtle.
It’s reverse psych. You know what stop means!
I always go through those anyway.
To all men: why the fascination with anal sex anyway? isn’t the vagina enough of an inspiration?
Who can ever resist pushing the big red button that says Stop?? That’s a clear invitation if you ask me.
If you really want someone to stay out of there, a tattoo of worms, or sores, or the Grand Canyon would do the trick I bet. Though not as pleasant to look at, admittedly.
Just makes you wanna spank her don’t it? :)
Silvia, have you put a finger in there and felt around? It’s a completely different texture and feel from a vagina. It feels good, what other excuse does anybody need?
Silvia, also, the fact that it is so *taboo* certainly adds to the appeal. We’re not allowed there, so there must be something great about it. Remember how binge drinking lost it’s appeal after your 21st birthday? It was no longer forbidden, so it was no longer interesting.
If you read this blog, you must understand the excitement of sexual exploration. Honestly, why engage in oral sex? or try any other positions than missionary? Penis to Vagina is good enough, right? Experiencing the new sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and sensations is what sex is all about. Anal sex is another pleasurable, intimate act one can engage in with one’s partner.
I really don’t know what the fascination is, as a male I can say that the Vagina is better by far. It’s got the right textures and everything, the anus is smooth and doesn’t stimulate at all, plus who wants to have to deal with a woman the next day who has a sore ass. And as for Karl Elvis, no and stop really does mean no and stop.
Having only violated my ass myself, I cannot comment on partner issues.
All I can say is that with a little relaxation and a lot of lube, it feels very very different than something in the puss. Different and good, in a forbidden and super-hot way.
I feel certain that Karl Elvis knows that stop means stop, except when you’ve decided beforehand that stop means “ohmygodpleasepleasepleasekeepgoing.”
:D
I was never aware that a penis can make the difference between textures of skin (no sarcasm, seriously never knew that).
every boyfriend I ever had told me: it hurts at first, but then it feels good. never got to the “feels good” part and that’s what makes me wonder: isn’t the pleasure supposed to happen for both people involved, at the same time?
or maybe it is pleasant and i’m just doing it wrong.
Dracoda, tut tut. If you meant that the vagina is better for you, we’re cool. But if you meant that as a general statement, you’re wandering toward the perilous “the way I do sex is the right/only/best way to do it”.
Karl Elvis being a big boy, I’ll leave him to deal with your humorlessness in his own inimitable fashion.
Silvia, your boyfriends were clueless. If it hurts, stop.
You guys actually were doing it wrong, from the sound of it. Patience, relaxation, love, laughter, lots of lube — it’s not supposed to hurt.
It’s not for everyone; some guys are too big (not many); some women have trouble relaxing (more). There’s an element of trust/chemistry to that, so what worked with one guy/girl combo might not work with another.
It says “stop”, not “no entry”…
“A stop sign is a traffic sign, usually erected at road junctions, that instructs drivers to make a brief and temporary, but complete, stop upon reaching it, and then to proceed only if the way ahead is clear.” (http://en.wikip..._sign)
:-D
Excellent point, Eric, though I think I’d prefer one was says “Yield”.
Oh, and Dracoda, of course no means no and stop means stop. But not with you.
aahhh,anal sex discussion, the perfect antidote to a day of rampant capitalism.
I’ve been lucky enough to have some very enjoyable experiences, and here’s what I’ve learned:
-sometimes we women are just insatiable, and that’s the best time for introducing anal play
-after he has come once, and even better if I have too, his erection is calmer and I am more relaxed.
-add a vibe on my clit to distract from the initial discomfort, and straight to the moon
-oh yeah, lotsa lube
I really hated it the first two times I tried it, but the third time’s a charm.
Bacchus, it’s your blog, it’s your rules.
But don’t EVER friggin waggle your finger at someone who attempts to put the Kibosh on people reinforcing the idea that No means NO. Ok… sure, there were jokes made. Jokes bordering on encouraging rape.
Yeah, yeah, I know.. my saying that rape comment… it is bordering on my saying that MY way of NOT having rape sex is the only way to have sex, while you on the other hand are more open minded to rape. I understand all of that. But the joke was made, and someone actually responsible enough made sure that people understood the facts as truth, not the joke as truth. Don’t decide that you want to be popular with those whom you consider to have a good sense of humor, in favor of those who are actually in the right.
NO means No, and Stop means Stop. If you disagree, then let’s arrange something where you will change your mind. I guarantee we could figure out something where you would say NO and STOP and really mean it, and you would WISH that I believed you.
oh, and just as an added point, you can’t really tell me to STOP posting comments like these, unless Stop in fact does mean Stop. You can’t really tell me “No Posting of offensive or inflamitory remarks” unless No means No.
You can assume that Karl Elvis was kidding. You have no proof of that however.
But although humor can indeed be one way of dealing with serious subjects, there are indeed men out there who actually believe that No does not mean No, and that Stop does not mean stop. Don’t believe me? Two words for you. Date Rape.
The picture is funny. The picture does not mean that if you happen to actually SEE a hint of that tattoo peeking through a bikini, you should immediately run up, drop trou, and begin to push through the sign. We have no idea if this person LIKES anal sex and is poking fun at it, or does NOT like anal sex and decided to make a poingnant stand. All we can assume is that STOP means STOP.
“But don’t EVER friggin waggle your finger at someone who attempts to put the Kibosh on people reinforcing the idea that No means NO.”
i don’t think he was waggling his finger at that. i got the impression he was waggling his finger at the commenter that said that the vagina was better, since without specifying that it is better “for me” he was implying that the vagina is better for everyone, thus also implying that his way is the only right/normal/healthy way and that anal sex not the norm.
sorry, don’t mean to speak for you bacchus, but if you regularly read this blog bon gart, you will understand that there has never been anything said that would imply that bacchus is “open minded to rape” as you said. if anything, the distinction has been made between actual rape and sex play that might include rape fantasies. i don’t think he’s ever embraced a culture that thinks raping is ok.
Thanks, Caprice.
Somehow, Bon Gart, your comments escaped my notice, or I’d have responded ere now.
Bottom line, Bonnie Boy, is that I’ll waggle my finger at whomever I please. And I’m waggling it at you.
Karl is a longstanding participant here. As such, he’s earned a bit of forbearance. His persona as a creature of barely-controlled lust is, in my view, a deliberately humorous construct. As such, I did not — and do not — consider that he was undermining the rule adhered to by all civilized men — that no means no.
Your failure to recognize that he was not attacking that rule betrays some combination of humorlessness and unfamiliarity with the local characters. Your repeated pedantry on the subject puts me in mind of the knee-jerk safe sex people, who can’t help injecting safe-sex dogma into every conversation, no matter how inappropriate it may be to the topic.
I have to wonder what the tattoo artist was thinking. Not a day to skip the shower.
I see it’s been a while since the last comment, but better late than never. As a female, I find it pretty funny that she was willing to let someone put a tattoo that friggin close to her bumhole but she says no to anal (simply pointing out a point, not justifying anal lol).
Hammer Time!