Well, Duh: Sex Noises Influence Male Orgasm
From Mind Hacks via Violet Blue comes word of a recent study indicating that women use sex noises tactically to influence the timing of (which is to say, speed up) male orgasm.
This manoeuvring of male behavior not only ensures the delivery of his ejaculate, but may also serve to end male copulatory effort under circumstances when the female is, for example, suffering discomfort or pain, boredom, fatigue, or simply does not have enough time for the encounter to last longer. Females appear to be fully conscious of the positive effects that their copulatory vocalizations have on male self-esteem and a very high percentage reported using them for this purpose.
Er, duh?
I guess there really are men so self-absorbed they think their dicks are always-on unstoppable plus-ten magic swords of orgasmic screaming. But the rest of us know that sex is a game of mutual — but, and this is important, not necessarily simultaneous — pleasure. It’s a Rumsfeldian game, too — you bring to the game the tools you’ve got, and you use them.
So, unless you’re one of those hopelessly self-absorbed men, you were already aware that sometimes, your lady is making those noises because she knows the pleasurable effect it has on you, and not because she can’t help herself. There’s nothing wrong with that — it’s just another tool of pleasure, like fingers or tongue or that thing in your sock drawer you bought last time you were in The City but haven’t shown her yet.
Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=6552
Not to mention, it’s a poor lady whose male partner doesn’t also vocalize for her pleasure. And I don’t just mean dirty talk, though there’s that, too.
Re: “Females appear to be fully conscious of the positive effects that their copulatory vocalizations have on male self-esteem and a very high percentage reported using them for this purpose.”
According to psychiatrists, females also appear to be fully conscious of the NEGATIVE effects that their ABSENCE of copulatory vocalizations have on male self-esteem, and a significant percentage are capable of experiencing some sort of perverse pleasure in employing that “tactic” as well.
Psychology refers to this behavior using terms such as “withholding”, “manipulative”, and “controlling”.
Some women employ this technique so successfully that they are incapable of experiencing an orgasm via the ministrations of their partner, no matter how skilled or well-endowed they may be.
One tends to feel sorry for the partners of these women, but then, at least they can experience the pleasures of other healthy women. Sadly however, the women with this disorder, often can find NO one worthy of their approval and therefore the subsequent release of the emotions necessary for them to achieve their own climax.
Men should note that heterosexual women who vocalize loudly can be announcing to other nearby women that they have won just the competition (for his “seed” or merely for his attention), or be announcing to nearby males that the competition (for enjoying HER charms and skills), has just begun.
Bi-sexual or lesbian women may also vocalize to announce their own adroitness or the conquest of a prized member of the community, or to invite either additional concurrent “revelers” or to tempt successive “contenders”.
Note to women who are thinking of applying the fake vocalization method: If you should choose to utilize this approach (which I wouldn’t recommend!), remember the secret to great acting, is to NEVER get caught at it (attributed to Spencer Tracey). So, unless you are at least as good at faking it as Meg Ryan ( http://www.eros...-not/ ), this approach will likely have the exact OPPOSITE effect on your man…
Rumsfeldian?
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Well, you see, there are three types of orgasms. You have the known orgasm (she squirted, Sweet!), the known unknown orgasm (She seemed into it, but then she also had a bus to catch) and the unknown unknown orgasm (what’s up with all these books on Kegel exercises).
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I kinda hate that this association exists because now I will never be able to forget it. On the up side, now neither will you.
:-D
LOL, no, I was slantwise referring to his “you go to war with the army you have, not the army you wish you had” remark.
But yours is funnier.
I think Tommy got it, he was one-upping you, engaging in competition as alluded to in Dr Whiplash’s post
Or she may just be using those noises to provide feedback
so you can maximize her pleasure. Or maybe she’s doimg it for yours. Or maybe for the guy in the next room. Or maybe…
To my mind the conclusion of the study is like trying to say the purpose of speach is to be able to argue – sure very high percentage do use speach for that purpose but it is far from the only or even most important reason!
There must be a cultural element involved as well. Probably related to expectations.
An example. I find the female sound effects in most Japanese porn off-putting because of the squeaky girlish noises the women make. I suppose most Japanese men love it.