June 2nd, 2011 -- by Bacchus
Enjoying A Chained Man
I wasn’t planning to post any more Manara art right now, but then I saw this, and they do say turnabout is fair play. I don’t post enough stuff that shows dominant women, because I don’t see very much that seems authentic (in a narrow sense I just now made up where “authentic” means something like “she’s enjoying the situation on her own terms, rather than playing a role to cater to his fantasies”.) Bizarre though it may be to use a word like authentic in connection with made up scenes in art, this one struck me that way:
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Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=6955
Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=6955
Oh, like we could have *too* much Milo Manara…
Have to agree with the ‘not enough dominant women’, although I have an obvious bias given my blog.
I’m intrigued by your rational for why and the desire for authenticity. It seems to me there’s a suggestion of a double standard here. Do all the pictures you post of kinky submissive women meet that same bar? You’ve posted numerous kink.com shots over the years (not unsurprising given the quality of their stuff). Are all the paid submissives in those shots more authentic than the kink.com dominants? Was (to pick another example) this post: http://www.eros...taff/
particularly authentic in a way that a lot of dominant women images aren’t?
I wonder if personal preference causes a projection or attribution of greater happiness or ‘authenticity’?
Just to be clear – I like your blog a lot. I link to it. You can obviously post whatever the hell you like. I just found this line of reasoning kind of weird.
Again, I have an obvious bias here, but I like to think you can’t go too many posts on my blog without coming across some happy dominant women having genuine fun.
It wasn’t reasoning … it was impression.
One thing I will cop to. Since I’m not as interested in femdom material as I am in femsub material, it has to be of higher quality (subjectively speaking) to catch my eye in the first place. My maundering about authenticity is one of the factors that can enhance my perception of quality, but it’s just one of them.
So, I don’t know if the standard is “double”, but it’s very emphatically different.
[…] on erosblog Bacchus has a post where he attributes his relatively small number of femdom related posts to a lack of authentic material. This struck me as kind of odd, and I left a comment on the post to […]
I believe that I understood what Bacchus meant the first time around.
Two things come to mind:
1.) There is supposed to be a very real “shortage” of “authentic” female dommes in the “authentic” dom/sub world.
2.) Models who are merely pretending to be dominants for the camera, appear (to ME at least…), to have more difficulty getting their head wrapped around the role, and less trouble portraying submissives. I’m guessing that they may tend to enjoy the submissive role-playing a bit more, which would fit with the supposed higher number of “authentic” submissives. One thing that I’m trying to say here, is that (subjectively speaking), I tend to have more trouble separating the “authentic” submissive females from the inauthentic ones, than I do determining the “authentic” dominant females from the inauthentic dommes….
The inauthentic female dominants seem to fail so miserably, perhaps because they don’t truly understand and feel the role in their gut, and therefore have difficulty in portraying that role in any sort of serious manner.
[…] about some femdom art? She’s got a shirtless man chained up and she’s so happy about it, she can’t stop touching […]
Dr Whiplash – I think you’re mixing up two different things here.
There are certainly more submissive males than dominant females. That presents a significant problem for the millions of submissive men in the world who are looking for an F/m relationship. But to support a healthy porn industry you don’t need millions of participants. Thousands will do. Pairing every submissive man with a dominant women is hard (impossible), finding some genuinely dominant women to shoot port is easy.
In fact I’d argue that it’s one of the most authentic genres out there. Most of the female stars are professional dominants, who play both in their private lives and their professional lives. And the men are frequently volunteers doing it for the pleasure of the session. What you see in front of the camera is how they play when the camera isn’t around. I’ll bet that there aren’t too many glamor models leaving work and then spending the evening posing in the nude around the house. Or regular porn stars filling their days off with hot three way sex on top of their washing machine.
I think there’s a far greater mobility between kinky porn/pro-domme/lifestyle play than in any other sex work. Lots of dominant women jump between these roles all the time. There are much stricter lines between porn star/models/escorts/swingers in the non-kinky world.
Without wishing to plug myself too much, take a look at the trackback link labelled ‘Authenticity’ above. I think that’s a beautifully authentic picture, and there are plenty more like on my blog and dozens of others.
I think Bacchus has a perfect reasonable position that he alludes to in his follow-up comment. He doesn’t like this material as much, therefore less catches his eye, therefore he posts less of it. That makes sense to me. The comment about authenticity didn’t.
Most of what I was saying was based on personal feelings, which is why I used words like “believe”, “guessing”, “subjectively”, “seem”, “appear”, and “perhaps”.
I think that there may be a semantic problem here, which is why I put the term “authentic” in quotation marks.
I have no problem agreeing with much of both what you and Bacchus seem to be saying.
Your uses of the term “professional” tends to support my position.
“Professional” (indicating performed for remuneration), to me, differs from “authentic”, which would denote a natural tendency.
It wouldn’t surprise me that a professional domme might continue to find reason play that role in their off-camera lives, even when no actual money was changing hands.
Somewhat relatedly, it also bothers me that certain individuals who are “naturally” sadistic, are frequently referred to as “dominants”, which to my way of thinking are two entirely different things.
Dr. Whiplash – No need to qualify that this is based on personal feelings. All of our comments are, mine very much included. Sadly nobody has access to an ultimate truth :).
Semantic arguments tend to devolve into endless hair splitting, so I’ll try and avoid that. But I very much question your contrast of professional with authentic. Those two things are in no way mutually exclusive in my view.
Is a meal at an excellent restaurant less authentic than one cooked at home? Or a band charging for tickets less authentic than the guy playing for free in your local coffee shop?
I take authentic to mean someone engaged and genuinely enjoying participating in an activity. That’s actually one of the things I like about a lot of erosblog posts. Bacchus has a good eye for people who seem to be actually engaging with their companions, or their surroundings or just the camera itself. He posts a mixture of pro and amateur shots, but that sense of engagement (or authenticity if you like) seems to be a common theme.
There is certainly bad femdom porn around – bored models wearing silly costumes sneering into the camera. But that’s a minority in my view. There’s also a huge amount of material featuring genuinely kinky women, some of whom regular transition between lifestyle/domme/porn/model roles. I’ve personally played with a number of them.
Having a different standard for different types of material based on personal preference makes absolute sense. A blog is nothing if not personal expression. But implicitly suggesting a consistent standard and saying there’s a lack of authentic dominant women material seems more problematic in my eyes.
As for BDSM terminology it’s certainly messy and inconsistently used in many cases. I even had a post to that effect a couple of months back:
http://www.femd...-you/
“…saying there’s a lack…of material…”
Which, of course, I never did. I said “I don’t see very much”, which is not the same thing at all.
I think I’ve made my actual point rather clear, and since it’s almost entirely an assertion about my subjective and highly incomplete experience of femdom porn, I don’t think the extensive set of arguments being propounded against it makes very much sense.
I would say it’s a pretty strong implication that “I don’t see very much” equates to a lack of material given the context of who was writing it and where. Or were you really expecting readers to add a mental “…..because I don’t look for it” ?
Anyone, although I’m always happy to talk about femdom porn, I’m guessing I’ve beaten this dead horse enough :)
I think that’s an inference (yours) rather than an implication (mine). So, you’re arguing with yourself here. Dead horse, indeed.
ah Bitchy Jones, where are you when we need you…
definitely! love me some dominant women who get off :D
Note to paltego:
I didn’t mean to imply that professional dominants weren’t authentic. I fully agree with you that they are NOT mutually exclusive. If I were drawing a Venn diagram of the two groupings, I’d have a vesica piscis in the center representing pros who authentically enjoy being dominant.
However, I’d have to say that I’ve see bands play for money who openly admit that they no longer enjoy reproducing the music (even though they act as though they are having a good time), and I’d bet that bands playing for free in a coffeehouse, are more likely to be performing because the are authentically enjoying it.
That’s all I was trying to say.
Oops! I meant to say “I’ve SEEN bands”. I left off the “N”…
[…] everybody, about six weeks ago when I posted Enjoying A Chained Man, I would up exchanging emails with Molly Ren from Stuffies, who volunteered to assemble a guest […]
[…] Source: Enjoying A Chained Man — ErosBlog: The Sex Blog […]
Yes, this is what I want(my fantasy)…a man in chains to cater to me. I’m not gonna lie, I would start with pleasuring him so well. Kissing every inch of his body. Sucking on his nipples for extended periods of time…all the while, stroking his dick. I would want every moment with me to feel good! I want his dick good and hard for when he lays on the bed and I straddle him 69 style. At this time, I wouldn’t touch his dick but just ride his mouth until I cum in it and then I would start riding his dick with my pussy and let him cum inside of me. Knowing me, I would probably cum on his dick again because the thought of him cumming in me makes me even hornier, lol.