I’ve been saving this image since forever to post today, and then I almost forgot. What a catastrophe that would have been:

Looks like an explosively good time!

Do you spend too much time hanging out in sex toy stores? Here’s a chance to test your mad brand identification skillz:

Name That Sex Toy

Alas, every now and then the pictures have lame and inconsistent censoring on them. What kind of weak sister writes a sex toy quiz but doesn’t have the strength of conviction to show pictures…15% of the time? Sorry if this sounds harsh, but censoring pictures of sex toys strikes me as actively bad, like censoring safe sex information so that sexual newbies can’t see exactly where the condom goes. What are we doing, protecting sensitive eyes from pictures of…plastic? Pegs my Lame-O-Meter.

Oh yeah…I missed two.

Although I’ve long been pleased to link to Violet Blue’s blog, the blog itself is not all there is to see at her Tiny Nibbles site. For instance, she offers that all-too-rare beast, real sex toy reviews with nitty-gritty details of the things in actual use. Here’s a paragraph from her article on vibrating cock rings, just to give you the flavor:

I had been very curious about the Neptune Ring Vibe, the vibrating cock ring that has been around Good Vibes almost as long as I have. I’ve sold more of those little pink dolphins than there are fish in the Steinhart Aquarium and I’ve been dreaming about wrapping that little pink ring around some lucky guy and going for a ride. My day had come, and hopefully so would I. Batteries in, dolphin working great, and onto him it went. We tried it on his lubed-up shaft (hint: lube the boy, not the toy — ahhh!) and attempted a fit. One of the things I was beginning to notice was that he needed to be all the way inside me for me to feel the buzz, so as delicious as thrusting was, the vibration was intermittent. I was on top and the dolphin still wasn’t hitting my clit in that just-so way, and my bright boy had an idea: doggie-style.

As anyone who’s ever been disappointed by a sex toy can tell you (and who hasn’t?) the world needs more of this sort of research and writing.

Here’s an image from a book called The Rotenberg Collection: Forbidden Erotica. If it’s the vintage image it’s purported to be, it was a remarkable piece of darkroom creativity when made.

Similar Sex Blogging:

• A Face Full Of Pee
• Next Time, Find A Bigger Tree
• Blowjob In The Pissoir
• Peeing With Lady Gaga

Doxy writes:

I have always had difficulty making female friends. The guys I had covered. Guys are easy. They don’t plot. They don’t catfight. They rarely make the effort to betray intentionally. Men are just horny little dogs. You feed them, you cuddle them, you pat them on the head and tie them to trees. They’re relatively simple.

I don’t have anything to add. Except, perhaps, that you want to make sure you tie us nice and tight unless you are up for some evil laughter followed by friendly wrestling and a good stint of bark time your own fine self.

I liked San Francisco well enough when I lived there for a couple of years. However, this story reminds me that, as a geeky broke straight boy with no motorcycle, I missed out on some of its more signal charms. True fact: the most exciting thing I ever touched on Ocean Beach was some sea glass. I like better the sound of this San Francisco:

She headed north on Franklin and I wondered where we were going. When she took a left onto Geary I realized she was headed for the beach and not either of our apartments. That was fine with me a little shiver went through me at the vision of being caught by a park ranger while her head was between my legs.

She must have brought other women here, I thought, when we stepped onto the sand and I saw that she had chosen a spot that was sheltered from the wind. When we had arrived she had opened up one of her saddlebags and pulled out a blanket, and she spread that out for us now. The air was warm, but maybe it was just that my whole body felt as though it was desperate for her touch. We both kicked off our shoes.

She sat, and pulled me down with her. Then she reached over, opened my jacket, and both of her hands went to my breasts….

Thanks to Crystal at Exposed for sharing this and lots of other stories.

Being as I am a charitably-inclined fellow, I don’t suppose Dirty Whore means to be a cruel tease when she writes:

Have I mentioned lately how much I love to suck cock? How much I love to take it deep and let my throat squeeze the head, or how I like to flick the most sensitive spots with my tongue? How I enjoy using my hand while I lick and suck on his balls?

That’s only the beginning.

Cruel, cruel I say!