Somebody needs to start worrying about the things Attu sees.

Like, for instance, this link to boytaur.net: “Online resources for boytaurs, multilimbers, shapeshifters, and their friends.”

From Dubberley, which was added to the blog roll long after it should have been, comes a link to this rather startlingly detailed list of male masturbation techniques.

When you consider that this particular technology is invented independently by just about every male on earth, unless first explained or demonstrated by another fairly inexperienced practitioner of the art, it perhaps makes since that a profusion of methods can be compiled. But some of these are…surprising.

Learn something new every day.

Here’s a funny story about a guy who decided to test the whole “ribbed for her pleasure” advertising claim. Notwithstanding his lady’s lukewarm enthusiasm for the experiment:

“Now get on your knees. I’ll have to enter you from behind, so you can’t see what I’m doing.”

“I can just close my eyes and picture Antonio Banderas as usual.”

“Ha ha.”

I had her on her knees, ass up in front of me, legs apart, and entryway poised at an angle of least resistance. Despite all the arguing, this was, and shall always be, a sight that quickly gets me… attentive. I rolled the first condom on, a ribbed one. I called out, as cold and clinical as I could, “This is Exhibit A.”

Two sex quotes:

“When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.”

— Matt Groening

And also:

“The ability to make love frivolously is the chief characteristic which distinguishes human beings from the beasts.”

— Heywood Broun

The Lord of the Rings slash keeps coming (as it were). Now with pictures, thanks to the Fun with Photoshop Brigade, who bring us Arwen/Éowyn in a loving lesbian embrace:

Just in case anyone had not figured this out yet, it’s worth highlighting: Dancers could take over the world any time they decide to do it.

More fun with the Two Towers movie — this time, the condensed parody version. Complete, as you might expect, with lots more implied Sam and Frodo slash.

EOWYN: Hal-lo, handsome!

ARAGORN: Hi. You handle pointy things very well.

EOWYN: Yes. My only fear is dying a virgin. Hint, hint.

ARAGORN: Okay! Well, let’s move along.

Thanks to Asymmetrical Information for the link.