There’s this Naked Jen, see. And she’s got a blog, see. And it’s your pretty regular sort of blog, see, except that now and then (fairly often; durn near every Friday, even) she posts a picture of herself naked — usually naked in a public place. Ya gotta know all that, before you read (and look at) her 10 Things To Know About Disney World post:

10. When attempting to take a naked picture lying on Mickey’s Bed, alarms will go off. There’s a reason that there is a do not cross sign there. His bedroom really is off limits. The minute you step into his bedroom, loud alarms sound and Disney cast members come running to see what all the commotion is about. They then will discover you standing there half in the room, half out of the room without your clothes on and they will not be PLEASED at all.

It is a far better idea to take your naked photos in Minnie Mouse’s house, which is right next-door. While there are loads of very small children traipsing through, there are no alarms and thus you have a far better chance of actually getting naked, having your niece snap a quick photo, and moving along to the next attraction without creating a spectacle!

There’s even a picture. Obviously photoshopped (well, the mouse ears are obviously photoshopped in, and Jen says the whole thing is a photoshop) but still funny as hell.

It wasn’t the toe sucking that caught my eye when I saw this gallery:

No, it was the disgruntled look on the face of the girl doing the sucking. (Don’t pay any mind to that guy in the audience yelling “I’ll gruntle her!”) Then another shot established some context for her disgruntlement (for surely the toes would not be an unbearable indignity):

There’s really nobody who does girls being mean to each other better than Whipped Ass.

For some time now I’ve been compiling one of the two weekly Sex Blog Roundups over at the extremely-cool Fleshbot. But for one stupid reason or another, I’ve kept forgetting to link to the roundups after I’ve done ’em. Today’s roundup is here, so git along, little dogies!

Doxy the self-described phone slut has written an impressive How To Get Started In Phone Sex tutorial.

Linked in part here because practical advice about sex work is always hard to find. Linked in greater part because, if it inspires even one person who finds it here to become self-employed and thus free herself from cubicle drudgery, I will have done my good deed for the day.

I love the juxtaposition in this photo between the classic sultry-librarian glasses (straight out of the pages of Playboy circa 1973) and the alterna-chick cute nose ring and tats:

From Hippie Goddess (a pay site, but one with an unusually large gallery of free samples).

Maybe I’m paying more attention now, or maybe other sexbloggers I visit are more willing to talk about stuff beyond the wet and friction parts. But it’s good to know that I’m not alone in trying to find my way through the mess of my life. Waking Vixen shared some thoughts on sexual autonomy that hit home.

Jane put up with a lot of this self-doubt stuff, and when I’d go on about not being able to bridge the sexual gap between how I’m imagined and how I am, she’d ask me why exactly I was so fixated on having partnered sex. The right and healthy answer for me is “because I like it and its fun,” but during those moments, the truthful answer was more along the lines of “because I need to be wanted and to prove that I can.”

How I’m imagined and how I am…..seems like a big difference between those two for me right now. Also the focusing on sex with somebody else is something I’ve been stuck in alot. I’m not hung up about masturbating, but it’s been something I do more to scratch the itch rather than to enjoy it for its own sake. And since R, there hasn’t been a lot of it. I think it’s time for both of those things to change.

Vixen closes with this:

Truly, it’s all about balance, but when other people’s balances wobble, I have to be able to make do with what I’ve got. I have to do better than that – I have to maintain and fulfill my own sense of sexual self. I can invite others in to share what I’ve got, but kick them out when they’ve overstayed their welcome.

I think R got to me as much as he did because I haven’t given a lot of attention to my own sense of sexual self. And that happened because I’ve been thinking of my sexual self as something that has to have somebody else to activate it. That isn’t true, and I know it…..or at least, I used to know it. Vixen, thank you for the words of wisdom.

Whenever you read those “all about how to have kinky sex” sites, they always emphasize the need to “negotiate your scene in advance”. Most such essays on how to conduct this eminently necessary negotiation makes the process sound stilted, complicated, wearisome, and awkward. Of course, that’s entirely at odds with my observations of the actual kinkiness that I’ve brushed into in my life — so I’ve wondered if this wasn’t some sort of “do as I say, not as I do” advice for newbies.

In partial answer to that question, I present Bret and Hiromi’s he-said-she-said dialog entitled “The Logistics Of Pee Sex.” It’s emphatically a scene negotiation, but not self-consciously so. In fact, I’d say it’s a blueprint for a frank light-hearted scene negotiation that also happens to sound like a fun conversation. Scales fall from the eyes.