Just in case you don’t know it, it’s damn near impossible to write decent erotica when all you hear outside are tractors, harvesting corn and soybeans and bringing in bales of hay–and let’s not get into the lovely odors the manure spreading puts on the breeze.

So, let’s pretend I have different neighbors…say, these interesting folks at Edinburgh Dinner Party.

The blog is fairly new. For maximum pleasure, read from the beginning. Then come back and tell me how many times you got off while reading. :blush:

Here you go: everything you ever wanted to know about the Hello Kitty vibrator.

Yes, it is/was a real thing:

Last night I had one of those feels-real dreams that I wish had been real…I was at a real hot bar, people hooking up all around me, and me just aching for some action of my own…then a muscular guy came over and went all dom on me, telling me he wanted me and wasn’t going to take no for an answer. Then he grabbed my hand and pulled (not too hard, because I wasn’t all that unwilling) me over to a table that was on the edge of the dance floor, where we could be seen and the lights played over us too. After some spanking that got me good and wet, he tied my hands together above my head, flipped me over, and slit my dress right up the middle, displaying me for anyone to see. Even though I was embarassed, it was arousing to see people watching…and enjoying the show…and I was so excited that when he began to pinch my nipples, I came. That led to lots of punishment, including him selling “pussy pokes”–fingers or tongues, $1, because I was “such an easy slut”. As soon as I’d start to get seriously worked up, he’d tell the person to stop, and laugh at me as I begged for more. Finally he unzipped and out came the hugest cock I’ve ever seen, and he plowed into me, just straight in all the way, which sent me over the edge. He pumped me hard until he came too…at which point I woke up, soaking wet and throbbing from coming in my sleep.

So that must mean that I’m living proof that some girls’ brains are a counterpart to the male brain shown here:

Don’t remember where I spotted this one.

I’ve said it before and I’ve said it again, they have better TV in the UK:

In a new Channel 4 reality show on common sex problems, volunteer couples make love on camera while presenter Tracey Cox advises on their performance.

…

But there’s no getting away from the fact we get to watch couples having sex live on camera. A CCTV camera in the bedroom allows Cox and co-presenter, Michael Alvear, to assess their performance, then offer all manner of tips, toys and advice. ‘Even I, who talk about sex for a living, found it rather extraordinary sitting there and watching real people have sex,’ Cox admits.

From Diary of a Porn Publisher:

I have to spend a few hours each day reviewing the new adult websites submitted to the adult search engine I bought last July to see if I will accept the sites or not. Today, I ran across a description for a site that gave me pause. “The girl in black stockings receives pleasure and satisfaction from tickler inside a clitoris.” Is it possible that there could be adult webmasters out there who lack a basic understanding of female anatomy? It doesn’t seem credible.

I should think that would hurt….

Took off Thursday night for a road trip, to see a good friend that I haven’t seen since high school. She’s now a mom to three girls (yikes!). Didn’t expect much to happen that was worth mentioning here, but I was–happily!–wrong.

First, the girls are big PowerPuff Girls fans, so episodes were a near-constant backdrop to our conversation. This line caught my attention: “You’ve got to eat it, to beat it.” Turns out they weren’t talking about what I immediately thought of (despite the verbs being backwards), but some evil broccoli-space-aliens. It was actually a pretty clever episode.

My friend and I had lots of fun being giggly and catty. One conversation kept us laughing throughout the evening … I was telling her about my first live-in lover, and how he hated how I dressed in the winter. No, I don’t go in for those cutesy holiday-oriented items … I like wool. I like the feel of it against my skin … but he hated it, said it was too itchy to wear without a lining or layer underneath, and looked horrified, I reported to my friend, “… when I got dressed for work wearing a wool sweater and wool slacks and –gasp!– nothing on underneath!”

Amid giggles, she accused me of having a wool fetish, which set me to wondering (amidst various jokes concerning woollen condoms and the like), is such a thing documented? Fetish Network doesn’t appear to have anything … Trusty Google doesn’t show much either … a funny story that isn’t really on target … Sweaterbabes, which is somewhat closer … could it really be that I have, unknowingly, created a new fetish category? :blush: I doubt it, but it’s an amusing thought nonetheless.

And, since it’s Saturday, a relevant sex ‘toon: The PowerPuff Girls get naughty with Kenny from South Park:

Her: “I need to take my shower.

Me: “Why?

Her: “I feel stinky.”

Me (after extensive hands-on investigation): “No you don’t.”