December 25th, 2004 -- by Bacchus
This was the second-nicest Christmas card I got this year, from Jordan Capri:
You can see the full sized version here.
(The first-nicest card, of course, was from The Nymph.)
Similar Sex Blogging:
December 23rd, 2004 -- by Bacchus
I’ve never quite “got” the whole social networking concept. Sounds like Philip from Hot Action (who is so back!) had the same problem, until it got explained to him:
I didn’t really understand how it works, this whole Friendster, MySpace phenomenon. My friend explained it thusly: “You put up a profile and then you write to cute chicks and say ‘You’re cute’ and then you get to bang them.”
That’s not how I usually operate. Anyway, I already waste enough time on the Internet. I’m too lazy to go looking through some website trying to find cute girls to pester.
Can’t I just put up a profile, I wondered, and sit back and let women contact me if they’re interested? Apparently so. But how does that work?
“You give them your email address, then they add you.”
I was confused. If a woman wants to bang me and she already has my email address, wouldn’t it make more sense to just send me an email saying, hi, I want to bang you, instead of going through all this rigamarole with MySpace and profiles and whatnot?
Well apparently the whole appeal of it is that it’s a network. So when you’re all through banging me, you can go on to bang all my hot friends.
Ah. I get it.
December 21st, 2004 -- by Bacchus
A deep Christmas question from The Collar Purple:
“Do ponygirls get dressed up as reindeer in December? And what would you call them, Deergirls?”
I think this picture starts us down the road to answers.
December 19th, 2004 -- by Bacchus
There’s a rumor floating around via email, to the effect that Christmas has been cancelled for lack of interest. What’s more, this time there’s photographic proof:
December 18th, 2004 -- by Bacchus
In case you missed it, there is a set of funny conversation transcripts on the forums at Bondage.com that are making the rounds of the blogs. A kinky man gets surreal phone calls from his mother after she finds out about his kink, and begins to explore her own:
Mom — I mean it. We went out last night and he said it twice!
Me — Where did you go?
Mom — Well, just upstairs. But still.
Me — Did you like it?
Mom — It made me smile. But I think I was blushing.
Me — From that? Why?
Mom — Because I didn’t know how deep to go.
Me — You’re losin’ me. What?
Mom — You know, with my finger.
Me — Ummmmm, Uhh. Well� (Why do I bother? I don’t *have* to answer the phone.)
Mom — Well? I never did that before. I wasn’t sure if I would hurt him.
Me — Poop finger. (System shock is an ugly thing.)
Mom — What?
Me — You gave the poor guy the poop finger. Christ.
Mom — We’re experimenting. Isn’t your mother allowed to experiment??
Me — Exactly what did I do to deserve this?
Mom — Just tell me how far in I can do that.
Me — You really put your finger in his butt, huh? (Nothing surprises me anymore.)
Mom — Only a little ways. I was too embarrassed. I wanted to keep going.
Me — You won’t hurt him. Just buy some Astro Glide.
Mom — I brought a case home.
Me — Good fuckin’ god! You going to put a safety deposit box inside him? (Ok, I lied. Things still surprise me.)
Mom — Will you be serious?
Me — I am! That’s a lot of goop!
Mom — I have to get going, he’ll be back in a few minutes.
Me — Ok ok. He’ll know when it’s too far. Got a safe word?
Mom — It’s ‘Jingle.’
Me — Good enough. Love you. Don’t call back mkay?
Mom — Rotten kid.
Me — (Click)
Obviously this is one of those internet things to be taken with a grain of salt — this could easily be quality comic fiction. But remember, there’s no way to know for sure. Saying you are sure with too much certainty only makes you look like a bear of little brain.
Found via Bondage Blog.
December 16th, 2004 -- by Bacchus
From the “English is Not My First Language” file:
This pills is an all earthy herbaceous tablets containing a miscellany of grasses known for advancing intimate longing and discharge. By victimisation this product you should experience an increase in intimate longing, a betterment in your volume and execution, as well as increased power and delight during sexual activity.
Well. Who could possibly fail to victimisate this fine product?
December 16th, 2004 -- by Bacchus
Here’s something you don’t see every day: an animated .gif of a fellow making rather vigorous use of one of those plastic male masturbation aids (aka “pocket pussy”). It’s rather eye-catching.
