10,000 Foul Mouthed Teenagers
Wednesday, August 24th, 2011 -- by Bacchus
As a middle-aged gamer who simply can’t twitch my mouse as fast as a thirteen-year-old, I tend to gravitate toward games that reward patience, experience, and higher-level strategies. Does this keep bunny-hopping tweeners from teabagging my corpse? No it does not. But it helps.
Despite my coping strategies, however, there remain days when I feel like I’m swimming in a cesspool of pre-teen immaturity. Which is why this webcomic made me laugh so hard:
What It’s Like To Play Online Games As A Grownup
(Click to read the whole thing.)
My favorite line: “And they stink of Mountain Dew and Ritalin, sir.”‘
One must be fair, though. There’s a heavy selection bias at work here. On the internet, nobody knows you’re eleven — unless you act like the stereotype of the obnoxious eleven-year-old gamer. I’ve played many an hour with perfectly civilized, decently-skilled, strategic gamers who were better than me at some stuff, only to be stunned to hear them key up on the in-game voice channels with a beardless voice.
The gamers who are the most frightening opponents, though, are the young ones just back from (or on break from) our real-world wars. They have the youthful speed and reflexes, combined with often-relevant training and experience, all topped off with a serious dose of aggression and passion-to-win. Formidable indeed. I like to say that age and treachery always triumphs over youth and skill, but it’s not true as often as I’d like.
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