March 18th, 2026 -- by Bacchus
When Little Girls Grow Up
Women never abandon floromancy (flower divination, aka “he loves me, he loves me not”) but sometimes women like Jess do update their expectations of it when they grow up and get married:
The flower always knows!
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Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=35048
Shorter URL for sharing: https://www.erosblog.com/?p=35048
Sounds like a self-fulfilling prophecy! I’m sure there are weirder come-ons than “the daisy said I need it up he back door and it never lies.”
For a lot of people it’s hard to be open about what they want. If a harmless game with a flower makes it easier, the wise man smiles and plays along.
Elf Sternberg recently posted that its hard to find a straight space in the USA where people are as honest that “I am here to find a sex partner” as a gay bar or sauna. I should try finagle’s idea of knitting lessons or a dance class.
@Vagans I believe I recommended walking a dog.
I suspect if you go to a knitting class looking for sex, then you are likely to find out all about casting off…
finagle, I am definitely not a dog person and taking on a living thing because it might impress someone is base. Book clubs and a LARP have never introduced me to someone who wanted to jump my bones, but I could try jogging or rock climbing (and more book clubs and board game nights etc.)
Vagans, it’s always possible to walk somebody else’s dog! Dogs want to go for walks, you’ve done a mitzvah whether you meet anybody or not.
@Vagans
Like Bacchus said, the dog being walked does not have to be yours. When I met my partner they were walking their dogs during lockdown. I do not and never have owned a pet of any kind. Even though we’re now together, they are still their dogs.
(Sorry that sounds grammatically clumsy, but my partner’s pronouns are they/them, so what can you do)
As for other activities, I don’t want to criticise your experiences, or try to rationalise. I’m a shy introvert, like you I suspect. LARP did work for me, but only after I started running a group, staffing and ensuring others had a good time. For a while I was in a pan- poly- of LARPers. That dissolved in time. Many years later I met the love of my life after a few hard years when I was enjoying solitude and not looking for anyone.
finagle, are you suggesting walking person A’s dog, in hopes that I meet person B and she is turned on?
I dunno about finagle, but it strikes me as a multi-party win for someone to borrow someone else’s dog that wants more walkies to then give that dog extra walkies and thus get an excuse to get out into the community with a handsome animal that provides social proof and opportunities to meet and talk with strangers in the park. What happens after that, who the fuck knows, but I’ve had phases in my life where all of that would have counted as a lot more exercise of creative positive agency than I was actually managing.
@Vagans. Nope.
My partner met me walking their dogs. I was just out walking on my own.
I do however agree wholeheartedly that walking dogs is great exercise, a great way to lower the barrier for starting a conversation with people who otherwise might hurry the other way, and if nothing else a kindness to a dog or dogs who would otherwise perhaps have been sat at home while their human is busy. You can even make a living doing it if so minded. You’re not a dog person, so fine, not for you, but absolutely if anyone reading this is, then there are plenty of dogs looking for another walkies, and lots of other people out there walking dogs who need no other excuse than ‘nice dog’ or ‘what breed is that?’ to open a conversation. After that, it’s up to you, but the dog has done all the hard work of removing that first huge social barrier