The current Savage Love advice column fields an inquiry that begins:

I have a strange fetish: I would love to have sex with a woman who is incredibly bored with me being there. If she were doing something else like reading a book or maybe doing her nails or possibly watching TV while I was going at it, I would find that incredibly hot.

Dan gives a long, thoughtful, and nuanced response about erotic humiliation scenarios and how to ask your honey to indulge you with them. But he missed the obvious question:

“If you like this sort of treatment, why not just get married?”

Buh-dum-DUMP.

…to the mother of your child:

Dave: “How are the stretch marks?”
Melly: “Sexy as hell, you syphlitic retard.”

Here’s a bit of teenage discipline:

Thanks to Making Light for spotting this .sig of the day, which is clearly in the spirit of John Norman parodies of the “Houseplants of Gor” ilk:

“I was kept naked on display in a cage for my Master’s pleasure. The steel band around my ankle told everyone who saw me that my role in life was to chew on his stiff cuttlebone.” — from Parakeets of Gor

Quite a long time back Erosblog linked to Sticky Kitty’s explanation of why she liked being spanked. Now SpankBoss (who is blogging up a storm over at the new and prolific Spanking Blog) explains the spanker perspective, or his anyway:

Why spanking? It’s hard to be successfully introspective about the things that make us hot. But if you’ll accept an armchair-psychology self-analysis, I think it’s a power-and-revenge thing. But that sounds…well, not worse, but perhaps more important, than it should? It’s no big deal. Rather, like most mild fetishes, it’s more of a vestigial thing, a left-over artifact of a bad adolescent decade. Like most guys who aren’t jocks or hunks, I was pretty frustrated as a young man, and got told “no” a lot, or (worse) ignored. Spanking a woman (in fantasy, against her will; in reality, with her consent) amounts to a spot of harmless payback. It’s sexually hot because when a woman is being spanked, she is, literally and symbolically speaking, in no position to say “no.” If she could (in fantasy), or would (in reality), it would have happened already. I guess you could say spanking liberates my inner mustache-twirling dastardly villain. All in good dirty fun of course.

What a find: girls kissing. Lots of girls, lots of kissing. Simple pleasures, what could be better?

This one’s for Debra, who says she likes her some tentacle sex: