Remember about twenty years ago, when the camel toe fetish was new? I mean, the fetish wasn’t new; but the name and keyphrase as a hot internet search term, and the camel toe haiku, sort of were. Anyway, this joke ad dates from that era, if my metadata don’t deceive me:
About that “Cougar model” with the built-in beer opener: I knew a guy who was in Southeast Asia during our wars there. He swore on a stack of bibles (for which he really didn’t have much other use) that this one time when he and his buddies were on R&R they went to a brothel (not what he called it) where one of the sex workers (not what he called them, either) could do the beer-opening trick even without the benefit of a plastic prosthetic. I wonder if Amber the Farm Wife ever tried that?
It’s every young male gamer’s ultimate fantasy. Sitting in a big comfy gaming chair, speed-running through a first person shooter, blasting enemies, porn playing on the side monitor, and a lovely woman kneeling at his feet, sucking his cock determinedly. Yet she seems to demand absolutely nothing of him:
This video and the skillful cock-sucking are both via the hard-working pro-am indy pornographer and performer MissBanana.
Is she a blonde in a bathtub? Or a crappy plastic figurine in a flimsy puzzle box with a hidden spring-loaded catch? Through the magical machinations of the Novelty Mart corporation, she can be both! And all for the low price of just $.98:
As seen in the pages of the January 1951 issue of Planet Stories.
You’ve got to imagine this happened at one of those sleazy beach resorts along the Black Sea coast, or on a cheap island in the Mediterranean. Lots of young people on package tours, not much excitement, a pressing need to generate some publicity and get the party going. And so the posters went up: “Nude Beauty Pageant! Free Bottle Of Champagne For Every Contestant!”
The man’s notorious at fetish clubs throughout the city. Always well dressed, always with a single monomaniacal goal with every new play partner. They call him “Three-Fingers Charlie”:
I’ve never actually been in a multi-floor department store with elevators and live (or recorded) announcements to let you know where the elevator was letting you off. I wouldn’t even understand the concept without having seen the ancient British sitcom Are You Being Served? but now that I have, it also informs my comprehension of this joke:
I can’t make out the cartoonist’s signature, but the cartoon appeared in the November 1943 issue of the What’s Cookin’! comic magazine.
