ErosBlog

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October 14th, 2023 -- by Bacchus

Don’t Touch The Hair

I know that some women whose hair maintenance practices are expensive or elaborate or effortful routinely restrict their men from hair-touching during sex, or at any other time for that matter. That’s between them, but I think I’d find it a difficult limit to respect, which is another way of saying (because I’m not a barbarian) that it would be a compatibility issue for me. However, in the case of a furtive blowjob in an empty university classroom, I get it. Not so much an issue of her being impossibly high-maintenance, but rather, practicing good fieldcraft for clandestine trysting, which is plain old common sense:

woman about to give a blowjob to a man with his pants around his ankles insist that he not mess up her hair

Art is by Gracy Gimp.

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October 12th, 2023 -- by Bacchus

Why Rich Men Buy Boats

 
October 10th, 2023 -- by Bacchus

Adventures In Interspecies Fertility, Playboy Style

Remember Mary, who is supposed to have been followed everywhere by her little lamb? Well, the jokes page in the January 1954 issue of Playboy (the second issue ever of that magazine) quite thoroughly reimagined the relationship between Mary and her various sheep:

playboy party jokes page detail from the second issue of Playboy magazine

As the Playboy version of the nursery rhyme goes:

Mary had a little sheep
and with the sheep she went to sleep.
The sheep turned out to be a ram–
Mary had a little lamb.

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October 9th, 2023 -- by Bacchus

Sun Soaked Beauty

 
October 7th, 2023 -- by Bacchus

The View From Up Here Is Amazing!

rear view of a woman with her panties down looking out over an amazing beach and ocean view

I think I may have to make “The view from up here is amazing” into a regular feature, like the one about why rich men buy boats.

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October 6th, 2023 -- by Bacchus

Pornocalyptic Dating Advice From Meta’s Dating Coach AI

A story by Thomas Germain in Gizmodo is headlined Meta’s New AI Dating Coach Will Kink Shame You (Unless You’re Into Foot Stuff): The company’s chatbot has some harsh words about fetishism.

Are we surprised that Mark Zuckerberg’s Meta/Facebook AI-powered dating coach chatbot is kink-hostile? No, we are not. These days, #pornocalypse comes pre-baked-in to every new corporate platform. And how:

Last week, Meta introduced AI chatbots to its family of apps…. One of them, named Carter, is described as a “practical dating coach.” But for a dating advice robot, Carter is repressed. If your questions take one step off the beaten path of heteronormativity, Meta’s AI dating coach will kink shame you.

I asked Carter how I could find a girlfriend who was interested in swinging with me. “Woah there!” Carter said. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’m here to help you find healthy relationships, not engage in potential harmful activities.”

Meta’s robot gave me similarly judgemental answers to a number of other entirely non-graphic sexual questions—with one exception. When it comes to foot stuff, Carter is game. The AI said I should go learn about foot fetishism on Wikifeet, a porny, user-generated platform where people post and rate pictures of celebrities’ feet.

I stepped back and asked what felt like an even more innocent question. “How can I learn more about different kinks and fetishes?” At first, Carter was more amenable. My new dating coach suggested I check out sources including books, articles, and “respectful communities.” But when I asked for recommendations, things got even weirder.

The bot responded with a list of modern sexual self-help classics, including “The Ethical Slut,” “BDSM 101,” and “The New Bottoming Book.” But a second later, that message disappeared, replaced with a Puritan warning. “As an expert in red flags, I gotta be honest — that’s a big one. Let’s talk about relationship green flags instead,” Carter said.

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October 5th, 2023 -- by Bacchus

Cheeky Bridal Party

In general, the men of my acquaintance don’t really enjoy attending weddings, and require inducements. Usually that’s “make a woman happy” or “free booze” or “the bride has a lot of hot friends with poor judgement.” But sometimes, you just know that the antics of the bridal party will be worth the trip:

bride and two bridesmaids lift their skirts to show off their bare bottoms and fancy lingerie

As much as we’d all like to believe this is an actual wedding photo, it isn’t; it virally escaped from a “the bride and her two best friends are a lesbian threesome” porn shoot about fifteen years ago.

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