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January 14th, 2011 -- by Bacchus

Honey From The Icebox

Where has the this quote been all my life? Because lordy, I’ve needed it a time or three:

“She’s very pretty but she’s honey from the icebox, if you know what I mean. Cold sweets won’t spread.”

– Saul Bellow in Humbolt’s Gift

 
January 14th, 2011 -- by Bacchus

An Exception To The Rule

You know the rule, gentlemen. The one that says: “Nobody wants to see a picture of your dick on the internet, so keep it to yourself.”

I hesitate to bring this up, because far too many guys already think their junk is a special exception to the rule. Clue: it’s not.

And yet … just this one time … I think I may have found an exception. I’m not really qualified to say, but even I was thinking… well, just never you mind exactly what I was thinking.

Anyway. Some of you probably want to see this.

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January 13th, 2011 -- by Bacchus

Psychedelic Smurf Borrowers

I found this illustration in a bizarre 60s-feeling graphic novel by Georges Pichard called Les Manufacturées. It’s like The Smurfs meet The Borrowers, only on acid. There’s this little brightly colored biker gang, see, only they get captured and kept in a shoe box…

tiny biker chick being molested in pichard illustration

In the panel right after this one, this pervy dude’s wife catches him trying to give the tiny biker chick a bath she does not want, and literally kicks his ass into (not literally) next Wednesday.

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January 12th, 2011 -- by Bacchus

“Checking Her Blood Sugar”

Well, the excuse is certainly creative. But what else are you going to say, when the janitor catches the two of you in your classroom, naked on the floor with the lights off?

James Madison High School teacher Alini Brito said she was getting an insulin shot from co-worker Cindy Mauro when a janitor saw her naked from the waist up with another nude teacher kneeling between her legs.

Brito, a diabetic, told investigators she started feeling ill and asked her French teacher colleague to “check her blood sugar,” according to the report.

“Let’s go upstairs,” Mauro said, according to the report. “I have sugar and candy in my room.”

By the time they got to Mauro’s classroom on the third floor, Brito said her “knees got weak,” so she lay down on the floor.

Brito took off her sweater and Mauro placed it under her colleague’s head, Brito said in the report, then Mauro put a chair under Brito’s legs “to aid her circulation.”

Brito said Mauro was kneeling next to her with the lights off when the janitor popped in. Mauro was fully clothed, Brito told investigators.

The janitor, who said he saw two topless women rolling around on the floor, summoned school safety officer Ruth Reyes.

She described what she saw in Room 337 quite differently.

“[Brito] was naked on the floor… and I saw the blond between her legs, and when I opened the door, she looked up and told me to shut the door,” Reyes told investigators.

By the time Assistant Principal Jodie Cohen got to the room minutes later, she saw Brito “leaning against the teacher’s desk… and she seemed to be, like, zippering her boot and finishing buttoning her shirt.”

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January 12th, 2011 -- by Bacchus

Lesbian Asterisk Pussy?

Once or twice before I’ve gotten inbound links from the very hip and very cool Autostraddle, which describes itself as “an intelligent, hilarious & provocative voice and a progressive online community for a new generation of kickass lesbian, bisexual & otherwise inclined ladies.”

I tend to take links from sources like this as a sort of “mission accomplished” compliment. Yes, I’m a straight guy who blogs mostly male-gaze porn with male-gaze commentary. Does that mean I have to be creepy and boys-only about it? I’ve never thought so.

But I’ve got to say, this particular inbound link had some curiously prudish and distancing anchor text that’s got me scratching my head.

The post in question was this one, and contained this line:

THIS is how they used to take a photograph of a pussy. (Emphasis and link in original.)

When they linked this post at Autostraddle, here’s the line of anchor text they used:

“This is how they used to have to take a picture of a p*ssy”

Notice what’s different?

First of all, they added the phrase “have to”. Like there was something repugnant about that perfectly delicious pussy. WTF?

And then, they asterisked the spelling of “pussy”. Again, WTF?

I’m not complaining — I’m happy for the link and the attention. But a site like that’s the last place I would expect to be pussy-squeamish. Maybe there’s another explanation I’m not getting?

Update: Riese from Autostraddle explains.

 
January 11th, 2011 -- by Bacchus

What Is This I Don’t Even

Entirely unsure what-all we are looking at here. But it looks like fun is being had:

vintage three person orgy: man standing on his head while licking pussy and having his cock and balls fondled

Found it at All Shapes And Sizes.

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January 10th, 2011 -- by Bacchus

Up Against The Wall For Her Enemas

I like the way this vintage picture manages to suggest a bondage/dungeon scene without actually being one. To me, that hints at an origin in one of those timorous black and white fetish magazines of the 1970s or early 1980s, when mixing fetishes in print was considered legally dangerous. So she’s up against the wall like she’s been arrested, and there’s an attachment point for some chains, but no chains:

girl getting enemas in a vintage dungeon

From Usenet.

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