|
|
The Sex Blog Of Record
May 16th, 2007 -- by Bacchus
In which Mistress Matisse risks minor puncture wounds (“ohnoes!”) for the pleasures of flustering a lab tech:
So I went into the lab area and sat down to get the draw. The tech was a good-looking young woman, maybe early twenties, and just slightly butch-of-center, who I strongly suspect was a lesbian. She gave me The Look, you see.
What’s The Look? It’s a look that straight women do not give other females. You only get it from women who are sexual with women. It’s usually just for a moment, unless she’s seriously cruising you, but it is, shall we say, an acknowledgement of sexual possibility. Usually it’s just the woman acknowledging it to herself, not to you, but if you watch closely, you’ll see it. The eyes widen for a minute when she looks at you, that’s always a tip-off.
Not seeing The Look doesn’t mean that a woman is heterosexual – she might just be very subtle, or just not in the headspace. But if you do get it, it definitely means the woman giving it to you is not 100% straight.
I got it from the tech. How nice. I don’t think she meant me to see it, I just think she’s just young and hasn’t yet learned how to school her expressions. So I gave it back to her, somewhat less subtly. And that seemed to completely throw her for a loop. Even nicer.
She began sort of fumbling around with syringes, stammering, and left the area – twice – to get various vials and labels and such that she needed. I just sat there smiling at her with one arched eyebrow, like she was a sweet but clumsy submissive.
It did occur to me that deliberately flustering someone who was about to jab me with a needle might not be the best idea. But I’ve actually been stuck with needles by some extremely mean people, and I handled that, so I figured I could deal with this. Because it was fun.
She dithered around a bit more, and then tied the rubber strap around my upper arm. “Um, is that – is that okay?”
“That’s just fine,” I said, slowly, holding her gaze. “Don’t worry. I’m pretty easy to get blood from.”
“Um, great, okay…” She dropped her eyes. I watched her focus on the vein in the bend of my elbow and stick the needle in. She glanced up at me as she did so. I didn’t flinch. I smiled.
“Sorry,” she said, for no apparent reason. “I mean… it’s no fun getting stuck with a needle.”
I contemplated answers I might make to that, but my conscience spoke up. Matisse, don’t mess with the kid’s head anymore, unless you’re serious. And you’re not.
So I just said pleasantly, “It’s fine.” We both watched my dark red blood fill the three vials.
“You’re right,” she said. “You are easy to get blood from.”
I couldn’t resist. “I’m pretty good at taking it, too.”
She blinked uncertainly and was quiet for a moment. “Um, well, thank you for being so, uh, helpful.”
I think I was probably the opposite of helpful, but I sat silently and let her fuss with taping the cotton ball to my arm. Then I stood up and gave her The Look again, just because I’m bad that way.
“Goodbye,” I said with a meaningful half-smile, and stalked off down the hall.
And that’s flirtation in the naked city, twenty-first century style.
May 14th, 2007 -- by Bacchus
[Update: The animated .gif was thrashing my server, please click the thumbnail or here to see it now.]
I’m hearing Scotty in my head: “I’m sorry Captain, we just can’t contain them any longer!”
From Titty Blog.
Similar Sex Blogging:
May 13th, 2007 -- by Bacchus
If you’ve seen Warm Water Under A Red Bridge, you’ll know the Japanese understand their shio.
If you haven’t, you’ll be going “Shio? What’s shio?”
Apparently, that was Momo’s question also. Fleshbot has a skilled cross-cultural operative to explain it all to us:
Fleshbot operative KokuRyu … reports:
“I came across an unknown Japanese word today in a YouTube video that appeared to be a high school chemistry lesson conducted by a sexy Japanese porn startlet named Momo (Peaches) wearing nothing but a frilly pink bra, perhaps from Peach John.
“I knew the word, shio, means “tide” or “salt water” in Japanese. But what was the shio in the glass beaker? I asked my wife, who’s Japanese. Instead of getting angry with me for looking at porn, Mrs. KokuRyu smirked and said, ‘It’s when a woman, goes puri puri, like the spout of a whale. You know, shio fuki. It’s when a woman squirts.’
“Suddenly the YouTube clip made sense! Glowing with post-orgasmic serenity, Peaches admires the clear liquid–her liquid — collected in the beaker. Peaches then decides to analyze her shio. She sniffs it, reports it doesn’t smell, and proceeds to tests its consistency; Peaches says her shio feels silky smooth. When litmus paper is produced, shio is determined to have alkaline properties.
“Next, gripping an elaborate, slightly phallic spoon, Peaches measures the salt content of her shio. Apparently, it’s less than 0.6%. Peaches then delicately inserts her slender index finger, moistened slightly with the liquid contents of the petri dish, between her lips. She finds that shio is basically tasteless, and not a little slimy. Peaches concludes by saying she enjoyed the opportunity to investigate her shio.
Similar Sex Blogging:
May 11th, 2007 -- by Bacchus
I gotta quote Bitchy Jones again. Unlike most of the folks who love to hate the splendidly cheesy literary phenomenon that is Gor, she gets why those books sold about a zillion copies and still go for megabucks on eBay, gets it well enough that’s she’s moved to give it a complete “vertical flip” in her mental fantasy editing software:
Gor is easy to take the piss out of, but the real truth is that deep down in my heart I know that if I were a male dom I would fucking love Gor to tiny bits. I would be in those chat rooms wanking and sweating and wanking some more while some middle aged housewife going through an identity crisis talked about herself in third person whilst pretending to serve me a mythical drink.
Yeah, like every other person in the world who believes in equality but gets off on inequity, I have the insane conflicted love for a bit of gender supremacy fantasy and I secretly in my dark heart wish that we had something as ridiculously camp and ritualised and sprawling as Gor over on our side of the river.
…
So, basically, it’s all hot and dusty and badly written and stuff. Women live in big castles and are tough and sexy and mean. But fair and honourable. And, yeah, they’re sexy, but it’s no big deal, no one’s looking at them because:
OMG the hot slaves!
Literally and metaphorically hot. Built like Greek gods and covered in sweat (from doing hard *hard* labour).
Yes, the men are, like the women’s slaves. Oh a few aren’t, but they’re weird. But also hot if you capture them and make them be slaves. So although these not-slave men are freaks they are kind of useful when complicity gets dull ’cause they have to be all *forced* and broken and whipped to shit and stuff.
Gosh, isn’t *forced* a nice word.
Anyway, on upside down Gor slave men are traded — bought and sold. There are markets. Men who transgress are punished. Viciously, mercilessly and publicly. (Which is nice.) Or maybe just punished for entertainment. Such awful punishments, predicament bondage and heavily ritualised whipping and stocks and cages and stuff like that. Really dehumanising hot stuff.
Some of the poor things are just kicked around like dogs, or made to whore themselves on the streets, butchly pretty ones wear humiliating skimpy clothes and get prodded to perform bondagey semi-naked suggestive dances with whipping. While drunken women molest them. And they would have to do all this over elaborate honourific address stuff, please, ma’am, may this slave please have permission to…
Golly, I really do like ma’am in the right context. It’s the apostrophe. You can see where his voice cracks even when the word is written on the page.
Anyway, they better get that formal address stuff right or else more whipping. Yeah. Pretty much any excuse for the whipping. And the, you know, submissive positions to vocal commands, and the bondage and… did I already say the bondage? Well I should probably say it a few times because there is so much of it.
Oh, and the key thing is that by doing this they would come to realise that they had never felt more masculine or desirable than when, er, being whipped, and sexually used and whipped a bit more.
Similar Sex Blogging:
May 8th, 2007 -- by Bacchus
Time for another vintage photo from Usenet:
Classic wallet porn, complete with folds.
The smile and the non-commercial posing make me wonder this might not be a genuine amateur “my wife with no pants” picture.
May 7th, 2007 -- by Bacchus
For your viewing pleasure, the United States Bureau of Prisons presents its training video for strip searches.
Including several phrases you never want to hear from a government employee: “Bend forward for me please, and spread your buttocks.”
Link via Sensible Erection.
May 6th, 2007 -- by Bacchus
A long time ago, my sometimes co-blogger Aphrodite was experimenting with web tech and she created an innocent and innocuous heart shaped favicon for Eros Blog:
It was never intended to be the final and perfect 16×16 pixel representation of ErosBlog’s deepest philosophies of love, lust, and sex, just a neat and harmless graphical flourish, good enough to “do” until something better turned up. (Any volunteer graphic artists out there who can do sexual magic in 256 pixels?)
So look what the Magic Comment Bunny just had to eat:
i liked this blog, apparently this is my first visit to the webpage and i m already writing on it….basically the blog is about sex in almost all forms ranging from the grose the spiritual and sensual….but one thing i really dislike about this blog is: when you open any web page in your Inetrnet explorer 6, there is a small tab assigned to each page, and it shows a small picture which has been assigned by the page maker. In case of the webpage for this blog a yellow coloured heart appears. Now, this blog is all about sex, and that too of the most exciting and grose forms, then it should not in anyway be associated by love, which is in the most basic way represented by a heart. This blog deals only with sex and desires similar to it, so why the fuck has a picture of a heart been associated with it. This is an insult to love. you wont realize it now, but you would understand when you go through the blogs at this page, they are fucking insane and plainly related to sex without any attachment to love. I dont condemn sex or the articles in this blog, nor am I a kind of person who hates sex, but then , this blog is just about plain sex and should not have a heart associated with it. The fucker who initiated this blog must have used something more represenatative of sex like a penis pic or a pair of tits. Change this thing about your webpage , u insane sex maniac.
Did I mention the bunny had to eat it eleven times? Yup, there were eleven of these identical comments sitting in my moderation cue this morning.
Magic Comment Bunny would like a Rolaids, please.
In all seriousness, it saddens me that there are people in this world who fervently believe that sex “is an insult to love.”
|
|
