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January 13th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Bad Sex Splogs Identified By URL

When you’ve been blogging for years the way I have, it can sometimes be hard to find something new to write about, or even quote. So, as you might imagine, I spend a lot of time on the search engines. Pick a slightly funky key phrase, type it into various search engines, see what sexy stuff turns up.

What turns up, in overwhelming volume, is “splogs” — spam blogs, stuff that uses blog templates but is just random junk designed to attract search engines.

The fascinating thing is that these splogs are universally obvious in the search results. The “snippet” invariably doesn’t read like anything a human wrote, and often even the URL is so obviously a throw-away that you know there’s no real site there.

I’ve gotten very good at spotting these things in the search results and not wasting my clicks on ’em. But, frankly, it’s not very hard. Case in point, not the worst URL I’ve ever seen but one that screams “not a real website”:

http://lesbianjailsex.pornyblogs.info/

I guess “porny” is to “porn” as “truthiness” is to truth. No kidding, here’s some of the search engine honeytrap “content” to be found at that URL:

She like bone with strapon and genuine love muscle togethershe is teen, but acts like a professional whore. Like the lesbians in this photograph much time is spent tongue bathing and slurping the clit. If you like the photos then surf further & check out the free lesbian sample clips that are on the smut-site. See this hottie work a honey pot like she never knew she could.

Now that’s sales copy!

 
January 13th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

A Good Start

From 1000 Orgasms:

My beloved woke me up pulling my pants down this morning. When his pants came down his cock pounced up and popped in from behind. Ahhh lovely, lush and sweet. We rocked there as waves of pleasure and sweetness rode the edges of my body. Up went the pants and our eyes closed for another few hours of sleep.

Later that morning I’m tugging at his pants, and pull them down around his hips. I plunge my lips over his cock, and suck him and jerk him until he’s hard as a rock. He’s moaning so fine. Phone ringing, kids on their way, I grab a condom out of the drawer. I take his cock in my mouth again, until he unwraps the condom. Riding my baby brings me the sweetest pleasure! We’re fucking fucking fucking loving sweet, and I come over and over. The one to mention is when he rocks me pushing my ass up and down on him. He turns me over and grinds hard, and comes. Another beautiful day, I say…

 
January 10th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Feral Girl Playing Naked Twister

Naked Twister is a perennial favorite here at ErosBlog, but I think I’ve found the largest-breasted exemplar yet seen in the wild. From the new-but-coming-along-fast Titty Blog comes this crouching nude twister-lady with a feral gleam in her eye and some notably pendulous breasts:

naked twister

I’m not sure if she’s planning a fast transition to a game of leapfrog, or if she’s just spotted new prey and she’s poised to pounce.

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January 9th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Rasputin’s Penis, Redux

For reasons that surpass human understanding, I’ve twice now blogged photographs of what is supposed to be Rasputin’s severed penis, preserved in a jar: once, twice.

Why (oh, ye gods of Olympus, why?) am I doing it again? Because it’s a very famous (and famously active, in its day) penis. And, more simply, because it’s there. Specifically, it’s there at urod.ru — scroll down at your own peril, you’ll find an absolutely huge closeup of the jar and detached (pickled) manhood, in living (dead?) color.

I’ll also link to a copy of the photo, as a hedge against future link rot. Don’t blame me if you decide to look.

It’s grisly. Seriously.

 
January 9th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Poor Old Tom

I love it when artists (unknown, in this case; picture found at Edinburgh Erotica) dirty up the old cartoon characters. In this case, it looks like a spot of “forced feminization” for poor old Tom (don’t he clean up nice?) and a little strap-on action. Trust Jerry, he’s holding Tom’s tail out of the way, and probably looking around for the bottle of Habenero lube:

mice make bad enemies

Update: Looks like the artist is “Bathgate 21” or maybe just Bathgate.

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January 7th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

Priapic Snow Sculpture

It is indeed the season to make snowmen — really BIG snowmen with towering erections — so I suppose this is appropriate:

snow sculpture with big erection

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January 5th, 2007 -- by Bacchus

The Domestic Arts

nude woman with broom and dustpan

“Oh, her? That’s the cleaning lady.”

 
 
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