Here’s a fun article that may be of use to a number of you ladies: Miss Vanilla’s Guide to Being A Mistress. It’s a sort of Intro To Femdom 101:

I call it “Miss Vanilla’s” guide because I really want to give people who don’t consider themselves kinky a chance to enjoy this. When I first started getting into it, I was awfully confused and intimidated by the idea of being “dominant.” Would I lose my femininity? Would it make my man less masculine? Would it sour our non-sexual relationship? I will approach all of this from the perspective of someone beginning anew, as best as I can.

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Techniques! What are some fun ways to let your man know that you’re in control?

“Bondage”. One of the easiest ways to get started is by tying him up. Pros: He’s physically helpless, so you get to focus on breaking his will with your sexiness. Cons: His hands aren’t free, so you have to take a very active role – you can’t easily kill time telling him to pleasure you with his hands!

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“Pleasure overload.” Let’s face it: Your man thinks you’re hot. Now you’re going to use that to your utter advantage! Make him DESPERATE. Caress his entire body – with your fingers, your tongue, or your feet! Trace your fingertips up his inner thighs. Trace spirals around his penis but don’t touch it yet. Tease his butt, if you’re into that kind of thing (more on that later). Lick, suck and bite his nipples. Tease his dick with your mouth. Exhale deeply into his ear, and suck his earlobes. Be sexy, and he WILL be yours!

Some really great news from Violet Blue, who just became a sex columnist for the San Francisco Chronicle. She’s really happy, it’s a huge opportunity for her and great news for those of us who value her perspective and think the world will be a better place for having it appear in a respected major metropolitan newspaper.

Congratulations, Violet!

Some details about her hiring and the deal she made:

It’s official. I’m now the sex columnist for the San Francisco Chronicle.

Not just ‘plucked’ from the blogosphere to freelance for a 141-year-old mainstream media institution; Phil Bronstein hand-selected me to be their frontline sex writer, with a column and everything that comes with it. I just got home from the Chronicle building — today was the final meeting with the PR department, and to set the launch date (I wore my Laughing Squid shirt to the meeting). At one point David Wiegand said, “We’re just making sure it’s okay before we plaster your face on buses.”

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I negotiated a really good deal for myself. My voice, my content, my sex-positive, all-gender, all-orientation stance is firm; they have agreed to run every edit and piece of publicity by me for approval; and after first publication rights, I own the columns, I keep the content. They’re taking a huge risk, and a huge gamble, and they’re letting me be me.

Awesome.

It sounds like this guy had a really good weekend — the toe sucking and fucking being only one of his highlights:

And then my date showed me a trick that was, well, a bit stupefying.

So at some point during the second round of sex, she gets up in a Reverse Cowgirl position, and bends down to A) give me a good view, and B) suck my toes while she fucks me. For those of you not into Shrimping, I don’t know how you can’t love it. A toe suck & cock stimulation combo is almost too much for my nervous system. I’ve had this before, but it’s a rare treat. My date, however, felt the need to show me that despite my travels and adventures, I have not seen it all.

She dismounts, turns around, and lowers her cunt onto my toes — Ummm.. ok. She starts fucking my big toe and lowers her head down to start sucking my cock. My toes were already electrified from the sucking — so I loved how her wet pussy felt all over my feet, and her face dropping all the way down to my pubic bone, burying my cock in her throat… I was just stupid with glee. This felt so good, so amazing, I simply can’t describe it. All the wires were shorting out. Loved it. And she was pretty pleased to have thrown me something new.

From L. Neil Smith’s Tactical Reflections:

It has been my experience of life…that a girl who says she doesn’t believe in pre-marital sex usually doesn’t believe in sex after the wedding, either.

We’ve all known ladies who think they can bat their eyelashes, flirt a bit, and get away with anything. Here’s one such who got the tables turned on her:

So yes, I got PLAYED. Fucking cop pulls me over on the way back from Augusta. I’m all set to talk my way out of yet another ticket- its no secret in my family that I’ve NEVER gotten one that I couldn’t sweet talk my way out of. Its MAINE. Its not hard.

Guy saunters up to my car and I’m hit with a blast of cologne and a pair of blue eyes.

Uniform + cologne combo.
CLEVER BASTARD.

So yes, I’m a little too embarassed to go into much detail, but there was some drooling and stuttering on my part, and yes, I got my very first ticket. $185. Fuck. I’m officially destitute. In my defense, when I got home, my sister could still SMELL HIS COLOGNE on my shirt. (Pixie back me up here!) I got played by the cop. Fine. I accept this. He knew what he was doing. I’ve gotten away scot-free with some crazy shit before. He was fucking HOT and had handcuffs hanging from his belt. How was I to resist? I just nodded and mumbled along simply because anything else that came out of my mouth probably would have ended me up in jail for solicitation.

Turnabout is fair play!

Google tells me this image is so 2005, but hey, it’s new to me. That’s Hulk Hogan (for the three of you who grew up in a yurt) and his wife Lizzie Grubman, and yes, her pussy parts on open display for the cameras:

Update: Whoops, she’s not his wife. I got suckered by the Google search I did after someone emailed me the photo. Sorry!

It had to happen. As the War on Moisture intensifies and becomes permanent, one of the worst-affected airlines has begun to fight back on behalf of its shareholders and would-be moist passengers. In a chilling foreshadowing of the War On Moisture endgame (what, you think we won’t see people stripsearched at gates and loaded on planes wearing nothing but clear vinyl TSA straightjackets, if mass air travel survives that long?), Ryanair has published this “humorous” photo, under the caption “New Airport Security Procedures Put Fun Back In Flying“:

As Boing Boing puts it: “The war on moisture is bad, but it’s nothing compared to the inevitable war on body cavities.”