Although it has turned out that I mostly prefer to focus this blog on the activities of other people, it is worth noting that it’s been six very happy months at Casa ErosBlog since The Nymph moved in with me. We remain deeply in love, and life together is very very good.

An aside for the gentlemen: It is true that no sensible woman expects you to remember or celebrate six month “anniversaries”. However, from this truth, it most emphatically does not follow that you should disregard such dates, in the unlikely (but lucky for you) event that your ponderous bear-like brain should happen to alert you to one. Rather, procure and deliver some small trinket. Trust me on this one.

From Mistress Matisse:

“No” always means “no”. But four out of five bratty submissives agree that “you can’t make me” always means “make me”. Especially in bed.

Of course, Matisse errs on the side of political correctness when she says “No always means no”. Not for nothing do I tease The Nymph by calling her “Little Miss No Means Yes”.

From Diary of A Porn Publisher, this made me laugh:

In the past, I have always eaten barbecued spareribs from the smooth belly of a naked slavegirl, using her thighs and breasts to wipe my messy hands. Tonight, for the first time, I ordered spareribs in a restaurant. I normally avoid eating any kind of finger foods in public because, well, I guess I’m too civilized. The ribs were delicious, though, and I gave them my full attention. When I finally did glance up from my plate, people were staring at me. I noted then that my hands were completely covered in barbecue sauce and gobbets of fat, encroaching up my wrists. I had to make do with napkins.

I pretty much think these pictures speak for themselves, when viewed in the proper sequence:

Thanks to Ropeguy at Bondage Blog for the pictures.

Not — so not — making this up. From the Village Voice:

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Everything Is Funnier With Monkeys. If J. Fred Muggs, Lancelot Link, or zoo-house fecal tossing have taught us anything, it is that every human endeavor is enriched by the addition of a screaming, leg-humping, ass-biting primate. Even, say, sex education. I beg your pardon? you might ask. Clearly you’re not acquainted with the strangest children’s book of the 19th century Sammy Tubbs, the Boy Doctor, and Sponsie, the Troublesome Monkey (1874).

…

It’s a Victorian sex-ed manual. For children. Starring a monkey.

Running this sex blog, I’ve been privileged to read millions of the words people write about the schemes and strategies they use to attract and keep sexual partners. Few writers on the topic manage to be as succinct as Ice Ice Baby, writing at Wax A Chump Like A Candle in the blog section at Bondage.com:

I will have him. Oh yes, I will.

Capture the mind. Feed the belly. Drain the cock.

He’s mine.

Yeah, that about covers the essentials.

From a random thread about the domain name speculation business, this post fragment made me chortle:

I dropped over $300k in the past 6 months building my [domain name] portfolio. and my girlfriend’s not too happy….

Her: “Do you know how big a diamond you could’ve bought instead?”
Me: “Yeah, but the domain name is an investment in my future.”

Doghouse!