Rainbow/Unicorn Pony Tail Plugs

I watch the new sex toy releases so you don’t have to, and when items of delight appear, I try to let you know. Today’s rainbow explosion is a pair of pony-type tails for people, anchored in the most intimate and effective way with a glass butt plug, and available in two styles: regular rainbow or pastel unicorn colors. Either one will let people know that you’re no ordinary pony!

From the website:

The combination of silky synthetic animal hair and sturdy glass sculpture makes this ponytail butt plug from Crystal Delights a must-have toy for fun-loving ponyboys or ponygirls and their trainers. Available in rainbow or pastel unicorn colors, this high-quality, handcrafted adult toy will surely get your little pony whinnying with pleasure.

Uniquely tapered, the individually-made anal plug has a wide rounded bulb and a narrow neck attached to a thick, heavy base. The dense, shatter-resistant, nonporous body-safe borosilicate glass is easy to clean. Tail is detachable and made of high quality synthetic wig hair; if necessary, you can spot-clean the hair with a damp rag, then hang up to let dry.

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Candy Heart Buttplugs

I hardly think I’m the only one whose first experience of serious flirtation involved the exchange of those ubiquitous Valentine’s Day candy hearts with the messages printed on them. Ah, elementary school memories!

Well, we’re all adults now. We have private bedrooms, we have credit cards, and we buy sex toys. Which means that we’re free to take candy heart flirtation to a whole new level: naughty candy-heart butt plugs.

Here’s a bit more about the candy heart buttplugs:

Naughty Candy Heart plugs let you get the perfect message across during anal play: Be Mine! Or for that matter: Spank Me or Do Me Now!

With a soft satin finish and a perfectly-angled tip, these butt plugs slide in easily with water-based lube. Washable, flexible, and playful, the Naughty Candy Heart butt plugs aren’t just for Valentine’s Day; they’re for every opportunity that arises.

The plugs are made of the highest quality silicone and are hypoallergenic, nonporous, and boilable. The end of one of these plugs tapers off into a cute, heart-shaped base which allows for easy and comfortable removal and play. The smooth satin finish has a buttery soft touch that becomes slick with lube.

The words are molded into the plugs, so they won’t wear off with time. Super durable hygienic silicone plugs insert up to 3″ and are 1.5″ at the widest, for just the right amount of stimulation.

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Bouncy Buttplugs

One of the funnest things about looking at sex toy advertising is that it’s a literature full of joyful absurdity. Case in point: A sex ball called the Rough Rider. Remember those bouncing ball toys with handles that are for riding?

They are not unheard of for use in porn as well:

(Yes, folks, that’s the infamous Bat Pussy!)

Back to the Rough Rider. You just know you’ll look like a rough rider indeed when you’re bouncing on one of these:

Yes, my friends, if personal dignity is not on your agenda (and anyway, who really has dignity while they have a dildo up their ass?) you can use one of these to fuck yourself in the butt with extra bouncy-bouncy action!

Frankly I’m surprised that the world is not full of femdom porn where men are humiliated by being forced to bounce around the dungeon on one of these while being whipped by dominatrices. Yes, I looked (cursorily). No, I did not find any. Perhaps you’ll do better.

Pro-Tip: If your local sex ball seller is out of stock, you could always get you a robust suction-cup-attached sex toy to improve the bouncy ball you can buy at a regular toy store.

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Chasing Lost Vegetables

I did not make up this caption. I am just quoting it where I found it:

“I told you, if you want to borrow my buttplugs, go ahead. This is the LAST time I’m getting a cucumber out of there for you.”