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The Sex Blog Of Record
Tuesday, January 7th, 2025 -- by Bacchus
I’ve commented before (and not just once) on the lack of a good word or phrase for the sexual practice of getting off by rubbing a penis between two sufficiently-generous breasts. Tit job, breast sex, titty fucking, and various orthographies and variations of these, all have their flaws and ambiguities. Stalwart commenter and occasional email correspondent Vagans recently alerted me to a blog post and citations therein that suggest a new-to-me terminology: the phrase “muscle fuck” and its mysteriously elaborate cousin, “Hawaiian muscle-fuck.” Here I will turn you over to the redoubtable Strong Language blog, joining in progress its review of a venerable book about the word “fuck”:
Back when I was a teen, c. 1980, some friends and I were cruising the streets of Seaside Heights, New Jersey on an off-season night. With us was a friend-of-a-friend, someone I did not know. He got into a verbal altercation with some other teens we had met on the street, and afterward as we drove off, he leaned out of the car window and shouted, “How’d you like a Hawaiian muscle fuck?!”
Now, we had no idea what a Hawaiian muscle fuck was, and truth be told, I don’t think he did either. We dubbed him the “HMF Kid,” and the incident stuck with me long after I had forgotten his real name. Over the years I occasionally wondered what a Hawaiian muscle fuck was, but it wasn’t until I had a copy of Jesse Sheidlower’s The F-Word in my hands that I found out. There it was, in print, under the headword muscle fuck, noun:
an act of rubbing the penis between a woman’s breasts. […] 1992 Playboy (July) 37: Sex quiz … Been involved in breast fucking (a.k.a. the Hawaiian muscle fuck)?
There’s a use of muscle-fuck without the Hawaiian in this sense from 1974, so the HMF Kid didn’t coin the phrase. All that remains to discover is why is it Hawaiian? But I think that is a mystery lost to the ages.
Such is the utility of Sheidlower’s volume that it could solve a mystery dating back to my somewhat-misspent youth.
My intuition tells me that the answer to “why is it Hawaiian?” lies in the 20th century military history of Pearl Harbor and the related thriving prostitution districts of Honolulu. But I freely admit that I’m guessing.
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Wednesday, June 28th, 2023 -- by Bacchus
There can’t be ten men alive who see this breast sex .gif without thinking “That looks like a lot of fun…”
I don’t have a video origin for this one but the performer is said to be Sensual Jane.
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Sunday, January 9th, 2022 -- by Bacchus
I hate linguistic ambiguity. When a woman envelopes a man’s cock between her tits and then a vigorous friction is enjoyed, most typically terminating when he comes all over her face, what’s a good name for that? I’ve seen “breast sex”, a bloodless term that sounds hopelessly dull. Most commonly, people say “tit job” or “tit-job” or “titjob”, presumably by extension from “blowjob”, but it utterly demands context. If no context is provided, everybody will assume a tit-job is surgical breast enlargement — obviously not the same thing at all! Is there, I wonder, a good phrase that’s unambiguous and also sounds like fun? The obsolete word “larking” is available, but I fear not enough people today know what it means; I had to do deep research the first time I encountered it. We’re left with “Titty fucking” or “tit fucking” as the best terms I’ve seen, and honestly, we could do better.
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Monday, December 27th, 2021 -- by Bacchus
If you are inviting and intimately encouraging a gentleman (or even just your schmuck of a boyfriend) to make a huge sticky mess all over your face and tits, I suppose it only makes sense to start the proceedings in your bathtub, where cleanup will be no hassle at all:
This .gif was part of the Tumblr-facilitated Cambrian explosion of porn .gifs as an art form, back in the day. I don’t recognize the original source material.
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Sunday, January 10th, 2021 -- by Bacchus
Every gentleman I know is familiar with the sensation of handling a pair of tits so big and round that the will or ability to stop squeezing and kneading them is elusive. So why not put all that energy to good and productive use? Just, you know, have a towel handy:
This tit-job artwork is by Harmonist11.
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Monday, November 25th, 2019 -- by Bacchus
She deployed not just her ample tits but her hands and tongue as well: it was nearly a full-body effort, and it seems to have reached a most satisfactory conclusion for all parties.
I wonder if anybody brought a towel?
The artwork is by Cholesenel.
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Wednesday, January 13th, 2016 -- by Bacchus
Scarlet LaVey from Velvet Ecstasy has a surefire plan for his orgasm, and the boobs to make her plan happen:
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Friday, August 29th, 2014 -- by Bacchus
As near as I can make out from fragmentary internet clues, this is an illustration by Pierre Louÿs for a book by André Collot, titled Au temps des juges. Chants bibliques.
Update: It looks like I may have got this backwards; perhaps Collot was the artist and Louÿs the writer of the book. See the comments.
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Wednesday, June 18th, 2014 -- by Bacchus
It takes a longer unit and a skillful partner to pull off this tit job plus tip-licking procedure in real life, but that’s no barrier for an artist as talented as Bill Ward:
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Sunday, August 11th, 2013 -- by Bacchus
I had been observing a quiet moratorium on outbound Tumblr links due to the whole robots.txt “hide the porn from the search engines” fiasco, but as that particular Pornocalyptic shit-show appears to be on late-summer hiatus, I guess it’s safe to resume for now.
Herewith, your Tumblr dispatch from that sideways-in-time universe in which President Obama gets a celebratory birthday blowjob (and perhaps just a bit of titty-fucking) from a spectacularly-endowed Marilyn Monroe:
Barack and Marilyn
Since it’s Tumblr, a backup link is never out of line.
20014 update: BOTH of those Tumblr links died, but I think I’ve found a more stable link to the comic.
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Sunday, February 17th, 2013 -- by Bacchus
Bondage sex is doubtless a lot easier, not to mention more fun, if you know a pair of cute blondes — are they sisters? — who will help you manage all the leather straps and stuff while you focus on the utter misuse of your captive’s breasts, to her evident delight:
This art is by Tom Sargent, probably from a book called Fireside Orgies.
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Thursday, October 28th, 2010 -- by Bacchus
It looks like she’s giving him her full attention:
If I recognize the art style correctly, this is by a comic artist named Luis Tobalina.
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