I am not well-qualified to opine on what women want, especially when it comes to sensitive subjects like direct and powerful clit stimulation. No man could ever be so qualified, for who among us ever becomes so intimate with more than a few women, or perhaps at most a few dozen? The most infamous Lothario, the most notorious Don Juan, might manage, perhaps, some hundreds of trysts in a lifetime. Yet the world has billions of women in it! Do not speak to me of representative sampling; there’s no reasonable way to normalize that kind of data in any scientifically-credible way.

No, my friends, when it comes to questions of how much direct clitoral stimulation your new flame may prefer, how powerful, how long, how closely-pressed, when to start and when to stop, you will be on an exciting voyage of discovery every time. You may ask, certainly, and a self-assured woman may even give you useful answers; but even so, there will be nuance and detail that is only learned in the doing.

That said, there are a few nuances that a man of the world may fairly rely upon. The first is that, generally speaking, clit stimulation is popular. Lots of women like it. You just have to figure out the specifics.

Second, women themselves often vibrate their clits directly during self-pleasure. I don’t have good data on preferred female masturbation techniques — indeed, I’m not sure anybody has meaningful data on that — but surveys and anecdotes collected at least since the days of Nancy Friday’s interview compilations reveal that vibrating sex toys have been a popular choice since the first electric “massagers” hit the market in the early 20th century.

Even more compelling is the evidence of the market. The brisk sales of modern toys like the Pomi Wand from Honey Play Box offer all the proof we need that steady, precise, and reliable vibration is solidly on the 21st-century list of “what women want”. The dark time when vibrating sex toys were almost universally phallic — I speak here of the cheap plastic dick-shaped battery-operated vibrators of the 1970s, marketed to men and sensitive to their insecurities — is behind us. Today, women are in command of their own pleasure, and indeed their own toyboxes, at least if they choose to be. Do they buy buzzing plastic cocks? Why, sure, sometimes they do! But very often the vibrators they buy are more modern designs with tactile materials and shapes designed to make it easy to place just the right amount of buzzy pressure in just the right place at just the right time.

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